I'm aware this is generic and has been done so much before and it probably will contadict previous claims... For the first time, I've felt an urge to come out to someone.. It hard to explain and you've probably all had them before but yeh.. My friend who I've known for around 8 years knows literally everything about me.. They know all my embarrassing seacrets and weird things and I feel like I should tell them of anyone.. (Excuse the bad phrasing) I know they support LGBTQIAA+ people and they aren't one to share things about someone... I know I should wait until I'm more mature and prepared but there is just something that is really getting at me and has been for quite about... (more bad English) Should I wait or should I go for it.. If I were to do it, how should I go about it? Thanks for any advice given..
I've had that feeling before too. Keeping things to yourself for a long time does make you want to say something. There's nothing wrong with coming out at a younger age. If you think it makes more sense to wait a bit longer until you're ready, there's no rush. It does make friendships a lot more comfortable once people (like your friend) get to understand you completely. I would personally recommend you to go for it when you are ready. If you do plan on doing it, it honestly doesn't have to be overly planned. At most, all that is necessary is thinking about what you are about to say. Ask for some private time and tell them the news. Just realize that you are in the best possible position--your best friend supports the community, is good at keeping secrets, and will still be by your side afterwards. That's a nice thought to keep if you get nervous ' v '
I just came out yesterday, in case you didnt see! http://emptyclosets.com/forum/chit-chat/211739-i-came-out-one-friend.html . It will feel INCREDIBLY uncomfortble and awkward especially if you have never said the words "I am gay" out loud (like me). You will feel so good afterward and chances are your friend wont care that your gay :icon_bigg
If it's what you need to do and feel that it's the right thing to do then there's no rule about it being the wrong time. However, you would have to consider the risk that someone else could find out as a result. You have to hold a lot of trust in your friend to keep the secret, which is a big ask. In my own experience, I was out to a few close friends, who all kept it to themselves. I casually mentioned liking a guy to another friend who I thought I could trust but the next day she went and announced it at school. Cutting a long story short, after that everyone knew. It wasn't a bad thing for me and I'm sort of glad it happened but I know from your other posts, that isn't what you want to happen. There is no way to know if your friend will out you -deliberately or accidently- but it is a risk that you're taking. A good way to come out to a straight male friend would be to tell him about a crush on another guy or celebrity etc. The advantage to that is that it shows him that you're not coming on to him or interested in him in a way other than as friends. Also on that, don't talk about his sexuality unless he prompts it. Emphasise that you haven't told anyone else because he is your most trusted friend. You have to remember though that it is a big thing you are asking from your friend if it will only be the two of you that know. All that being said, I don't want to put you off, just make sure you've considered the risk. ---------- Post added 3rd May 2016 at 11:14 PM ---------- Great news, that amazing feeling can definitely make it worth it.
