Conflicting feelings

That's rough. I've never been in a situation like that, so I can't give you any advice from experience. Is there anything else going on in your relationship that may be partially responsible for your repulsion to him? Can you talk to him about your feelings for women?

I've honestly got nothing to offer other than letting you know that people, like myself, honestly want to help, but may be lurking on the thread because they can't relate to your situation. You may want to browse the later in life forum, many people there have children and may be able to offer some insight.

 

Hmm....

Well, if you feel like you can't be with him in the long term, I would try to be honest with him. Tell him you're confused and need to sort things out. Ik it's gonna be pretty hard, but the sooner the better.

But hey! I'm only 17 and haven't had a lot of relationship experience, sooooo yeah. I'm just suggesting what I think would (might) be best. You know your boundaries. You just need to figure out what it is you want at this point. Don't let things get out of hand.

I know I'm not the best advice giver but.. I hope this might help a tiny bit at least lol...

- Raven

 

I can't believe I am even suggesting this due in part to some of my other posts in the last 24 hours because partially it would almost contradict some of what I said. But, if one would pay attention I've also stated that circumstances change things dramatically.

So, with that said. Since you are having a hard time differentiating between a passing phase, lust, and the such. It would seem that you do love him and something about your daughters and his relationship touches a part of your heart to the point you are willing to tough it out a little longer. Have you considered the option of allowing another person in bed?

I know that may not help in ALOT of ways and could make the already rocky relationship more difficult, but it's a thought. I only suggest that in a sense that if it is a phase, well that could help take care of it. In some cases it doesn't hinder it helps. You and he both get to act out a fantasy one that is shared, but he is probably unaware. Which in your case helps. How many straight men do you know would pass on the opportunity to have two women in his bed? Especially, if there is the added prospect of watching the women together?

Believe it or not even couples married or not find that exhilarating. Also, even men get jealous. It could help not only spice things up and help you, but could also add to that bond you all have. The jealousy factor could play in and pull you all together instead of push you further apart. Read into it before you rush. There are numerous books and information online concerning the subject. If it's not something for you, you'll know right away. Also, you could even teasingly bring it up to gauge his attitude and thoughts toward it to help.

You say things are tough and I know you have a kid. All that plays in ones libido. If his touch repulses you, maybe it's not so much him but the situation. Maybe your bond needs a little help in fixing the foundation. Instead of just thinking physical, think emotional. Or things you all have in common you like to do. Work, kids, just life in general can get in the way of spending time with your partner even on those levels.

Take a walk/hike together. Have date night, kid not included. An outing out in the day, kid included. Just spending time together like that can rekindle passion. If it's video games... Take some time to play a game with him, challenge him, beat his ass! ~_^ Even competition in a couple can be healthy! ^_^ I also agree with the advice. You know your boundaries... And even if you don't necessarily fit in the "later" category, it wouldn't hurt. Because, as stated... They have experience in what you are asking about.