Sometimes I really, really wish I had waited to come out. My family pretends I'm straight anyway... unless I want to do something "rebellious" like get a piercing or a certain haircut- then it's "You don't have to try so hard to fit in with the gays, Nicole! You can be a lesbian and still be feminine!" (yeah, okay thanks grandma, you were literally talking about important qualities to look for in a "future husband" two days ago) And it just feels really tense and awkward knowing that they know I like girls and are refusing to acknowledge it unless it's convenient for them. My grandma can't seem to make up her mind about how she feels about it. One moment she's introducing me to some random acquaintance of hers that happens to be gay like "have you met my granddaughter? she's gay too!" and she'll say things that seem supportive, like "your girlfriend seems like a very charming young lady." But then the next moment "girlfriend" becomes "friend" and she's telling all our relatives at Thanksgiving that someday I'll stop being silly and find a nice man. At this point I'm pretty much dead set on marrying a woman just to spite her lol :lol: My mom doesn't talk about it at all (but she is pro lgbt) and my dad doesn't either (he's... not so much..), but he just makes it really weird and awkward. Like he went through my texts and facebook stalked my ex girlfriend (while we were still together) and he literally pretends to be oblivious about me being queer, but then he says random things like "you should always be proud of who you are" and "i'll always love you just for being you" so I think he's trying... I'm not ashamed of myself, but I wish I hadn't come out because I feel like it just makes my relationship with my family more annoying and awkward. I came out almost 3 years ago and they still haven't adjusted. I'm not any different. They're just making it really weird and uncomfortable.
Well, in struggling with officially telling my extended family(week a few of them) A friend of mine time me this: "it's their problem, not yours. Let THEM be uncomfortable. Try to be yourself and don't worry about what they think. " I'm nearly at the point where I'm going to come out officially on social media, but I have worried about exactly what you experience. You may wish to either completely ignore it blatantly contradict those negative statements. Ex. Grandma, you know I'm not going after guys! I may follow up with a joke or something light to show you aren't effected(even though you are) and you aren't mad at her. You may also want to just tell her exactly what her comments mean to you and how hurtful/aggravating they are.
