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A little bit of Advice Please

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Wolfheart, Jun 9, 2016.

  1. Wolfheart

    Regular Member

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    I need some advice, not sure if I have posted in the right place. (So bear with).
    I am biologically female, gender fluid, romantically attracted to girls.

    I have known that I was genderfluid for a long time but only recently put a name to the feelings I was having. Now I am at the point where I want to be more open with my friendship group about my gender fluidity. But not sure really how to go about this.
    I am out to a few close friends and no one else. I want to change the pronouns people use for me and I want them to start calling me by a different name.

    About matters like this I can be shy and awkward so not really sure how to go about it (I have a really bad habit of burying really important feelings and shutting them off).
    I have a really diverse friendship group, the majority of my friendship group is gay or bi, with a few trans in the mix.
    So I wondering what's the best way to go about this. I know that it will be hard for some of my friendship group to get used to the name change and some time would be required.

    I just wanted some advice, from people who have potentially gone through similar things.
    Thank you in advance :icon_bigg
     
  2. SecretLilCj21

    Regular Member

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    You could start off with the name. Such as when they call you by a name just casually correct them and if they ask about it just say you want to be called by that. You don't have to fully come out at that point. You could also do as such with pronouns and you don't even have to explain yourself if you don't want to, but it's an easy way to get into the conversation. Once in the conversation just tell them that you've thought about it a lot and you are genderfluid. If you are around lots of members of the lgbt+ community as I was, then they will accept you and you will be fine.
     
  3. bubbles123

    bubbles123 Guest

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    You could tell one friend at a time if you want, or maybe ask the friends you're out to to help you tell your other friends, or to remind your other friends to use the correct pronouns and name.
    Are there techniques you used that helped you to come out to other friends? I'm not good at talking about personal things and feelings myself, but I find when I need to it helps to think about how you would say what you want to in an honest way and play out the conversation in your head. Also, setting up a time to talk with someone. Can be scary, but sometimes it's what you have to do if you want to talk to someone, that way you kind of have to. And also, I'm sure any friend would be glad you set up time with them alone if you needed to talk, if that's something you'd want to do.

    Hope this helps and best of luck!