Hello! I only just recently came to terms with who I am, and I really don't want to rush coming out to everyone around me about my gender, but I figure that I should start preparing for when that happens. I told my mom just a few hours ago, and I felt so upset and anxious afterwards even though she kept assuring me that she wasn't mad or disappointed in me. It was very overwhelming, to say the least, and something that I don't want to do again really soon. However, I don't want to keep this self-discovery in the closet forever. My family is very kind and accepting, and I know for a fact that my dad and stepmom would accept me for who I am. I just find it much harder to talk to them than my mom as my mom and I are really close emotionally. I told my mom via text messages, but that was a mess since I had a lot to say, and my dumb phone kept sending the messages in the wrong order. It was a hassle, so I've been trying to come up with another way to tell the rest of my family. I'm not good at talking. If I start talking about my feelings, I'll start crying, and I know that crying is healthy and all, but if I start crying then I won't be able to speak at all, even if I really want to. So that's kind of out of the question unless they confront me about it. I've also considered writing some letters: one to my dad and stepmom and the other to my sister, but I have no idea what to say. I want them to know this about me, but I don't want them to treat me differently or for things to change. So, I don't know how to explain it to my parents or my sister. I can't even imagine myself trying to explain this to my little brothers (ages 12 and 9) who don't know anything about the LGBT community. I don't know how to tell my friends, either, or extended family. Some advice would be great. Also, is it natural to feel upset after coming out to a close loved one? I felt like crying after texting my mom, and not out of relief. It felt like I just made a decision that I can never go back from. One thought that keeps running through my mind is, "What if this is just a phase that I grow out of?" even though I'm 99% certain that isn't true. I just don't want things to change between me and my family and friends. :/
congratulations on having the courage to tell your mother. my mother is the most accepting and loving person ive ever known, and ive never had the courage to tell her. youll be ok. you dont have to rush anything. take your time and tell people in your own time. i think its natural to try to convince yourself its just a phase, i tried doing that for years because i was too scared to accept who i was. youve made a huge step, and youll be happier for it. and dont worry about your brother and sister, im sure they will always love you and look up to you for your strength and courage to be who you are. ive always found children have been the most accepting and understanding people, its often grown adults who are set in their ways that see sexuality and gender as set, rigid things. good luck!!!!
