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I can't take it anymore. I want this wait of my shoulders

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by TanMan, Jul 21, 2016.

  1. TanMan

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 5, 2016
    Messages:
    90
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    Location:
    California
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Edit* typed to fast. Meant to say "weight".


    I can't take this anymore. I need to tell someone. It's driving me insane. My family is Christian, so being gay is a "sin." I'm scared what they will do/say to me. I want to tell my older brother (he has a few gay friends, but when he was younger he's said some derogatory things about gays). I'm just scared that he still has the mindset about gays. He even said he would kick his son/daughter out he they were gay (when he has kids). But I don't know if he was joking or not.

    My heart is literally beating so fast, I just want this weight off my chest and shoulders. I can't take it anymore.

    I live with my parents while I'm finishing up school. I'm doing a high impacted major (nursing), so who knows how long it will be till I get a job. I don't think I can live with this for another couple years till I'm financially stable. I want to tell them, but again, scared of what will happen.

    I had a therapist when I was 17 (for depression, but I wanted to mention I had these feelings but that's when it got cancelled) but it got canceled when I turned 18 (22 now). Does anyone know how I can talk with one without my parents/family knowing? And for free? I'm still under my parents medical until I'm 24, so I assume it would still be free?

    But again, I can't take this anymore. It's been eating me alive for the past 9 years.
     
    #1 TanMan, Jul 21, 2016
    Last edited: Jul 21, 2016
  2. YermanTom

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2014
    Messages:
    731
    Likes Received:
    37
    Location:
    Co Wicklow Ireland
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Is there a local LGBT support line or group near you? They are are generally very discreet and will be understanding of your situation.
    You also have this forum to discuss your issues, I've found the crowd here to be super helpful, informative and supportive.

    (*hug*)