I wanted to come out to my parents and family. I have been living away from them for couple of years now. They dont know where I live and who I am with. I live with my partner. At first, I thought I can stay this way. I dont need their support. I know they will disown. One time my mom and dad ask me to meet them even if just an hour. Partner doesnt like the idea of meeting with them. Partner fears that they (my parents) will be able to follow me and later will find out that I am lesbian and that partner is also lesbian. Partner doesnt want to come out ever in the closet. But I do want to come out and let my parents know who is the person I love the most. Sadly, as time goes by, I started to feel unhappy with the situation. One time, I told to my partner that I already came out to my parents(although it was a joke, I did not really tell. I just wanted to know what will her reaction is going be). She cried, she told me that she could no longer trust me and that I promised her that I will not tell anyone our secret --that we are lesbians. It sucks. I love her so much. She makes me happy. As the same time it really annoys me that I can't tell my parents what my situation is.
Perhaps she is worried that if you come out, your parents will tell her parents. It could be she is more afraid of her parent's reaction. What do you think they could do to her?
If I was in this situation I'd really just stay in the closet. Tell your parents behind her back and tell your parents to promise to never tell her parents if they would go to that extent.
I disagree with the last poster. If you want a secret to be kept, don't tell the secret to anyone, including your parents. On a very homophobic enviroments, the most subtle doubt will spread like fire. Also it is not good solid ground for a relationship to do things behind your partner's back. Nobody deserves to be told lies, even less by the one they love. I don't think that receiving such treatement would make you feel very well, right? Stay in the closet until you two have worked out a compromise. And don't do things behind her back unless you want to risk to lose her.
