How to tell brother; what do I say to get him alone so I can tell him in private?

It's time. It's time to tell my older brother. Not my entire family, but just my older brother. Trying to get him alone is the hardest thing to do. I want to tell him over text, but I need to do it in person. He's getting married in a couple months, and he's just been so busy.

I don't know how to get him alone between just him and I. I can't just say, "Hey, I need to talk to you. It's important." Saying that just sounds kinda "cliche," and idk, just stupid.

My family is Christian and a little homophobic. However, my brother deserves to know. I'm hoping it will bring us closer.

I just want this weight off my chest. Some days I feel like I can't breathe; like I'm suffocating. I want to fell free. I can't hide this secret anymore. It's been ~10 years too long.

 

We don't normally spend alone time with each other. We used to be really close when we were younger... Like when I was 10 or so, but we have been slowly separating away over the past couple of years. However, since all my brothers are now older, we've gotten a little closer. We and my other brother just had dinner 2 nights ago, and his fiancé was there too. I have been thinking about telling him over the past few weeks, but now it's time and I need to tell him; alone... Just him and myself.

I am in the wedding. Actually a groomsman

I texted him a couple hours ago, and all I could think about was saying, "when will you be free again? I need to talk to you about the wedding." That's pretty much what I said.

And no golf lol. Speaking of sports, I feel really distant when my family talks about sports. I played football in high school and that was great. But when it comes to watching sports, I don't really relate to what they talk about. That's one reason why I feel kind of distant from my brothers.

 

Well today's finally told him. It was really tough to start the conversation. At first I would joke with him and bug him by saying, "i need to talk to you." I said that over and over again, and we would eventually laugh. But down to all seriousness, I sat down and told him for real. I could tell he was heartbroken because he's come to terms with having a gay brother, but he seemed okay with it.

When I messaged him about the wedding, he kind of assumed that I wanted to talk to him about this. What I think gave it away was that whenever my brothers talk about girls, I kind of just sit back and stay out of the conservation. When that happens, I always feel uncomfortable.

But overall, it went well. AND, I'm still in the wedding

 

Thanks

It felt kind of good to get that weight off my chest. The entire time I just wanted to say, "I'm gay," but those words just wouldn't come out. The first few minutes he was like, "I think I know what you're going to say," and then I would just say, "well, what is it?" We just went back and fourth and kind of laughed during it. But then I said it. Very hard to say out loud when someone else is listening.

Next step is to tell my parents and younger brother, and then the rest of the family. Actually, I may not even tell the rest of my family. They are just a bunch of homophobes who have nothing better to do than think about themselves.

And actually, yesterday I made a coming out video for myself. It was about 6 minutes long. I want to post it online, but I don't think that's the right time yet. Eventually I want to make a coming out video for everyone to see (for all my Facebook friends). That would really show me who my friends (and family) are