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Out to mom...not dad. Help!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by LeticiaTheLesbo, Aug 13, 2016.

  1. LeticiaTheLesbo

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Washington DC
    I came out to my mom in April 2016. Her and I were away at a hockey tournamet and my dad wasn't there. I more or less was having a breakdown of sorts when I told her. Breakdown about life, not just being a lesbian. She was accepting and overall said not to make a big deal about it. That yeah I'm gay but I don't need to shout it from the rooftops and tell everyone I ever meet, just if it comes up type stuff. I agree with her. She told me that she would tell my dad for me, he seems less open and accepting about this type of stuff than my mom.

    Fast forward to August and she still hasn't told him and I feel like I should. My mom says that she just hasn't found the time to tell him yet or that it never feels right/is in conversation. Should I tell my dad? How should I? Just help!!!

    Thanks in advance punks!
     
  2. Edelweiss

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    Kansas
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Personally, I think you should tell him. But make sure you're mom is aware that you are doing so. Not that you need her permission to be out (it's your choice and no one else's. Only you can make that call.) but you don't want to blindside her with 'hey Dad knows now!' Understand? And to be honest, your dad would probably prefer to hear it from you than from your mom.
    As for how should you tell him... well, I don't really have any advice about that. Just try to get some privacy with him or maybe even have your mom with you for support. But obviously you don't want to do it in a more public setting in a room with family and friends. That can be too overwhelming for someone. And then just word it however you feel you should.
    But the most important thing is: Are you ready for him to know?