I left my coming out letter for my mom by her computer this morning before I came home to my city after visiting for the weekend. We just spoke on the phone like we do every afternoon on her commute home. Things were perfect and so normal. And now all I can do is cry because I feel like this was the last normal afternoon for a while. I feel like I'm losing her and she hasn't even discovered the letter yet. I'm a mess. This weekend has been a roller coaster of emotions for me. I felt so much relief having finally written the letter, I was confident when I left it this morning, I was pretty overwhelmed and numb during work, but now that I'm home I'm dying on the inside. I pray for the best but I'm expecting the worst. This sucks, guys. Like waiting for the bandaid to be ripped off. This is more of a rant, but thanks for reading. I pray the next generation doesn't have to experience these feelings. I pray there will be no need for forums like this. I guess that's why what we are doing is so important. Not only for us but for the change that is happening. I know it will be worth it one day. But today I'm struggling to see that.
Sorry to hear that you're struggling. I can understand as the whole coming out stuff can be tiring and it feels like it's never going to end - which in a way it never does. I also hope for a time when sexual and gender orientation is about as interesting and relevant as being left handed is nowadays: Worthy of a judgement-free comment but nothing else.
