I think this probably depends on who you're telling and what you think their reaction is going to be, and also what feels right for you. There's not really any right or wrong way to do it, I think. I mean timing is probably quite important, both for yourself and who you're coming out to; just being considerate as to whether the environment is appropriate and the general mood of the person is good. Coming out to someone in the midst of an arguement, for example, would probably be a bad idea, because you are already starting with a hostile atmosphere. I think when to come out very much depends on when you feel ready. A lot of people will advise you to wait until you are super sure about your feelings, but for me I came out to my closest friends when keeping it to myself became too much to bear; although I wasn't sure about where I fit into the spectrum, I was torturing myself by remaining so isolated. Coming out to them actually really helped make my feelings a lot clearer because I could be open about them. Therefore I would say the best time to come out is when you NEED to come out; where you just feel like you have to do it, or you really really want to. One thing to be very mindful of, particularly with telling caregivers or parents, is that if you are still financially dependent on them and they react badly it could put you in a really tricky spot. Assessing how you think people will react before you tell them is a good idea; testing the water, so to speak, by maybe commenting on or bringing up topics about same-sex marriage etc in order to judge how that person feels about these things can be a great indicator of how someone feels about homosexuality in general, and thus how they might react if you come out to them. Some people like to come out in a letter if they feel like the person they are telling might need some time to process things, some might choose to tell people in person so that they can be present to answer any questions etc that might immediately arise, others choose a phone call, some a text message, and some people even choose really quirky ways of coming out (I saw online that one girl held up a sign saying "I'm gay" on a roller coaster, which the photograph at the end of the ride captured and that's how she came out to those she was with.) There's many many different ways to do it and it all really depends on what will make you the most comfortable and also what way you think a most considerate and appropriate for those you are telling as well. The two most important things to remember, I think, is firstly making sure that you stay safe, that you aren't putting yourself in any potentially hostile situations, which can be helped if you assess the coming out environment beforehand. And also, that you are choosing a time that is comfortable for you, and appropriate for them. Hopefully this has helped in some way. I wish you the best of luck for when you decide to come out; please feel welcome to chat to me here or on my wall, and sending hugs your way! x Edit: keep in mind also that you do not have to come out to everyone all at once. You can do it in small steps, with who you feel most comfortable telling first, or who you think is most important to you to know first. I've only told my two best friends so far, but for me this was a good choice as it meant that while I am hanging out with them I no longer have to hold things back and I can fully be myself. It also meant that they could be support people when I finally do tell my parents.
