1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Boy friend or not?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by xadude, Mar 19, 2009.

  1. xadude

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 23, 2009
    Messages:
    0
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Aberdeen
    Last night I was talking to a friend on MSN whom I've dated before (and more too) and he had told me he had met this really nice guy who had fallen in love with him and he wanted him to be his boyfriend. For some reason it didn't work out (he told me but it's really complicated and not important for this post) and now he wants to date me again (although we were never actually boyfriends).

    This really shocked me because less than two weeks ago we agreed that we would not date because even though we have some feelings for each other its not that much. When I asked him if we were boyfriends now he answered yes and I got even more confused.

    The thing was I had talked to several people whom I met via dating sites that I could meet up with them again because nothing was gonna happn between me and the other guy. I really don't know if this all makes sence but I can really use some advice on what to do now...:help:
     
  2. Alex19

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2009
    Messages:
    1,157
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    New York
    if u dont wanna go out with him, tell him so. tell him to "pop off!" lol
     
  3. The Enigma

    The Enigma Guest

    lol I haven't heard that in quite some time but if you're not interested don't feel obliged.
     
  4. Louise

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2007
    Messages:
    1,376
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    France
    If your feelings are not that strong for this boy then don't get tied down in an exclusive relationship. Just keep him as a friend and keep meeting people from the dating sites until you find someone you really do feel for.
     
  5. Lexington

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2007
    Messages:
    11,409
    Likes Received:
    11
    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    So Mr Perfect didn't work out, and you get to be the consolation prize? Sounds like a wonderful basis for a relationship.

    Honestly, he doesn't sound worth your time. Keep him as a friend (or even a friend with benefits, if you can do that sort of thing), but keep looking elsewhere.

    Lex
     
  6. Eleanor Rigby

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2009
    Messages:
    2,767
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    France
    If there is one thing certain about relationships, it's that to make it work, you need two people. You friend can't decide by himself that he is your boyfriend. You've got your word to say about it. You are not his boyfriend until you decided to be so.
    I would had that your friend doesn't probably want dating you for the good reason (you date someone because you like him, not because you have been turned of by someone else), and you don't sound to really want to date him either. I'd say, remain friends, and find someone you really want to date (but, it is only my opinion).
    Take care, Eleanor
     
  7. olides84

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2008
    Messages:
    953
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Belgium
    Hmm. The way you describe it, you are his #2, and he is not your #1. Enough said. Go find your number 1.
     
  8. VanceA

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 12, 2009
    Messages:
    176
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Calgary, AB
    For someone to come out and say right away that he wants to be with you because person A didn't work out seems like its setting the relationship to be doomed.