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Should I bother to come out to my parents if I'm bisexual?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by butHitlerisDead, Aug 30, 2016.

  1. butHitlerisDead

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    South Carolina
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Hello! I'm 17, female and currently living with my parents. I've known I was bisexual for a few years now and was wondering if I should actually tell my parents about this. I'm fairly certain they just assume I'm straight as I've never brought up this issue (I've never had a significant boyfriend/girlfriend either to warrant bringing it up).

    So my question is, should I allow them to continue assuming this or should I tell them? If I were gay I feel I would go ahead and tell them, but since there's a chance I may happen to just date guys, is it even worth bothering? I don't know that my parents would be okay with it. They wouldn't kick me out or anything but I think the thought of me not being straight would make them fairly uncomfortable (and my dad believes it's a sin) and I wouldn't want to risk needlessly creating drama in the family (and there's the chance they just might not believe more or dismiss it as a phase).

    On the other hand, if I do find a girl I like, like in college or something, it might be a bit much to tell them I'm bisexual AND be like "this is my girlfriend!" Would it be unfair of me to drop a bomb like this on them? If you have any advice about this situation, thank you, I'd greatly appreciate it.
     
  2. Lambeau

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Coming out is different for everyone. Some people don't feel the need to come out in order to live open and happy lives, while others do. If you are bisexual but feel you lean more on the "straight" side, you might not feel as much pressure to tell them. It's all really how you feel personally.

    In response to your last paragraph, it depends on how you think your parents would react. Some parents aren't going to be as receptive to a deeper conversation, and some would more prefer to just have it come up casually in a conversation such as: "Are you seeing anyone?" "Yeah, her name is _______!" But again, it's different for every parent as to what they'd prefer.

    My advice, though, is to not come out until you feel ready to tell them. If there's a possibility of any harm (physical, emotional, financial, etc) you could be put in, I would wait until you were more independent.

    Hope that helped in some capacity! And good luck in whatever you decide to do!