I have no idea what to do. This year I'm at a different school which is public and I came from a private school. I haven't told anyone in my family that I'm trans because I have no courage what so ever. Even if I did manage to come out since I'm already into the year and everyone at the new school openly mocks trans kids so I would have to tell the teacher that I would like to be called something else and I also would recieve a lot of attention from all the kids in my classes. I also have really bad social anxiety. I would absolutely hate having to tell everyone and would try to never talk to anyone ever and not want to leave my room in the morning for school. Also my voice has already gotten pretty deep and my mom doesn't have much money to get new clothes for me. I know already that my dad wouldn't be supportive at all and never call me by a different name which would make me grow farther away from him which I don't want because he and I have a good relationship currently. I don't know what to do and I feel like I'll never be able to be my true self and just get more depressed each day. I don't even know if anyone can give me any advice on my situation but I wanted to tell somebody so here I am.
Hi dear, I'm so sorry you have to go through this, and I wish I could help you. I know school is a really tough environment as is when you've got social anxiety, so feeling like you have to hide who you are is just awful. I hesitate to give you any specific advice as I lack any solid experience- I actually just created an account not even a day ago to ask for help myself- but I'm not long out of high school and I know it how hard it was for me sometimes to get out of bed and get to class. It all seemed so important at the time, and academically, sure, it is, but socially... gosh, all the classmates who threw insults at people like me? I have no idea where they are now, and I don't care, because they don't matter to me anymore. Getting out of high school felt like freedom from behavior like that. Undoubtedly it still exists, but it's much easier to avoid now. You sort of learn how to find friends and acquaintances who accept you. I know that's sort of the whole typical "it gets better" spiel that I'm sure you've heard before, and I wish I could provide you with more, but I hope you do get some good advice. There are people here of all ages, with all kinds of experiences, surely someone can help you.
I'm sorry to hear about what you're going through. Having to go to school that's such a hostile environment can be very challenging. Not being trans I can't fully relate to the situation that you're going through, but as a gay guy who heard a lot of negative things about gay people going to school I can understand just how much of a shitty place school can be when people around you are willing to use a personal aspect about yourself as a method to attack you. Realistically there's always going to be prejudice out there wherever you go, but high school seems to take the cake when it comes to this kind of stuff. Myself personally I just kept my sexuality to myself and hunkered down and focused on those four years so I could get the hell out of there. I don't really know you as a person however so just because it worked for me doesn't mean it might be a viable option for you. You mention having a good relationship with your parents, or at least your father. Do you know what their opinions on trans people/issues are? If it's not a positive one, maybe the good standing you have with them might suffice to serve as a turning point for them? These are just a few considerations. Another option might be looking into some clubs offered at your school. If you can find something that can distract you or make you look forward to something that can at least maybe address your social anxiety given that you'd be around people who have a similar interest as yourself.
