Wants to come out to my parents. As trans. I mean.... if it was just my sexuality, I could live with it. But... this is the majority of my waking hours being misgendered and treated as a girl, because I'm not out to them. But.... the thing is, I actually came out to my mom once before as a lesbian (How I somehow went from that conclusion to being a gay transguy I have no idea, but I've actually met other people who've had the same experience, so *shrug*) and she didn't.. react well per say. Needless to say I chickened out and convinced her that I was joking. And I mean...... she says that, that she'll love me unconditionally, but ....I know she loves me, but sometimes I wonder if all of the things I hide from her are enough to make her hate me. She actually asked me if I was trans once, because I asked to go by a nickname at school. I said no, because I was scared of how she'd react. Plus at that point I really was not sure. I really really do want to come out, but... the fact is, I know that no matter how she reacts, it's not going to be some kind of warm and fuzzy happy time. There would be a lot of crying, yelling, and a lot of guilt. I'm mainly afraid of the guilt. Once before guilt almost drove me to throw myself into traffic, who says it won't happen again.... And.... I'm scared that I could lose my parents. Sometimes I think I'll just move to another country so that they'll never know I'm trans. As much as I complain about my mom, I love her so much. And I couldn't bear for her to.... not care about me anymore. I just really don't know what to do.
I thought the same way to my surprise my mom was more excepting then I thought my dad his disowned me my brother doesn't care and my love the fact that I'm her sister It happened by chance it's up to come out to your mom you will feel alot better in the long term
