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the day after (avoid awkwardness)

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Nitro, Mar 24, 2009.

  1. Nitro

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    So it starts by just holding another guy's hand and it ends in an attempted quickie. Holy expletive! is this earth boy that easy? I know just enough about him to call him an acquaintance and yet here I am with a phone number (he has mine too) and some neat sensory memories. I don't want this to be awkward. I also know that this did go a bit further than I am normally comfortable with - [not that I have much hands on experience (pun) here - a lot of firsts this last night].

    For all I know he could be puzzled in a similar situation. I'm open to moving this all along, but we got hands in pants a little fast.

    What is custom? What is the etiquette of the next day? I don't know his level of interest, seriousness, or if he was looking for anything more than the physical. To a certain extent I must evaluate this for myself. Help please.
     
  2. Alex19

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    ask him where he wants to take this and tell him what u want him to know.
     
  3. s5m1

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    Simply be honest with him. Tell him what you are thinking and ask him what he is interested in. I don't believe in games or anything other than honest communication. I have found most people react well to this approach. You may have started a bit faster than you normally do, but that does not mean you cannot slow down somewhat in order to get to know him.
     
  4. Just Adam

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    just ask him what the deal is and see how you feel about him...some people get all the luck though lol
     
  5. aerwolfen

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    it sounds like this guy is moving way to fast on you,over loading your senses and taking advantage of your newly coming to terms of what gay is,don't cheapen yourself,communication is the key,explain that your new to this,you have feelings,your open to explore all within time that you have borders,if he truely is a gentleman,he will guide you to the experience level your willing to go too, good luck to you,its your body,be the boss,my fellow canadian,.
     
  6. Jim1454

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    You have his phone number... so for one reason or another he'd like to hear from you. See if he's interested in having a coffee or going for a bite to eat.

    But beware that relationships that start out that way could very well just be physical ones. That could be all he is looking for.
     
  7. The Enigma

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    Damn Jim stealing my thoughts again!

    "You have his phone number so for one reason or another he'd like to hear from you." Yeah, you have his digits, call'em up the next day or something. If you call too soon it will seem clingy and somewhat emotional. Call him though, see if he'd like to go out again. If the sex was good on his end, undoubtedly it'll go further. If he made that mental connection with you, it'll go even further. You want to call to see if you're not just another booty call. Seriously.

    Don't put too much weight into it without finding out the truth. Or thinking, "what if"'s because that will hurt only thrice as bad. We're boys, we do impulsive things and have physical desires that overrule our logic and morality.

    Don't ever forget that, no matter what happens. :slight_smile:
     
  8. edogs334

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    Yeah, you definitely want to ascertain where he wants to go with this whole thing- I know that from personal experience :icon_wink. I second Enigma- wait a few days to call him- it'd be kind of odd to call him the very next day. And impulsive?! Whatya mean impulsive?! Like none of us guys have been like that before!
     
    #8 edogs334, Mar 24, 2009
    Last edited: Mar 24, 2009
  9. Jbright

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    Call him and if you have feelings for him tell him how you feel and see how he replies
     
  10. Nitro

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    Sobriety has brought new insights. (i) I was being a bit of a tease. Apparently that gets some kind of results. (ii) Damn that felt good.

    Current idea - try to meet up with him at the local pride organization's meeting tomorrow. Hopefully he will go. See what is what and how things stand between us.