the other day.. i was talking to my mom and she mentioned someone who is a child of an acquaintance who was born prematurely.. then she said it probably caused some birth defects.. then she said she's lesbian and has mental problems.. to me it sounded like she's lumping being gay as a birth defect.. like there's something wrong within us that's why we're gay.. well.. she doesn't know i'm bisexual.. my dad isn't any better.. he's totally homophobic.. sometimes i needed to bear listening to him say bad things about gay people while we're having a meal.. i don't know if i should tell them about it.. anyway.. currently i'm in love with a guy.. so i don't suppose they need to know that i'm bisexual.. i don't know what to do.. my friend told me that i should just tell them.. they're my parents.. they're supposed to accept me.. but what if they don't.. also.. only my online friends know that i'm gay.. i actually initially thought that i'm a lesbian.. but it turns out i'm not.. oh well.. it seems i don't know myself well.. has anyone here experienced the same things with their parents??
Im sorry to hear that... also, i think im maybe not that big of a help, as im not out to my parents myself (but they are thankfully not homophobic) or out at all... but Im also bi and in a relationship with a man. (sry for my bad english) First of all you should make sure that youre safe. If you are living with your parents and you are relying on them you should think about it if its good to come out. Maybe its not recommendable to come out, as long as you are not able to take care of yourself. Do you have a place where you could stay if it comes to the worst? Its hard to tell and I feel bad giving you the worst case scenario, but homophobic parents are not so easy to cope with. How old are you? Are you moving out in the near future? Also you could think about to clarify your sexual orientation before coming out. Not that that would be absolutely nessesary, its just, when you are feeling ok with yourself and you know who you are its easier to communicate it. But also, sometimes parents are a surprise after all. Maybe it will take some time, but there is also the possibility they will accept it after a while. But then i would also say, its better not to be around them when they are making up their minds.. otherwise it could be harder for both sides. I hope this helped at least a little.. I wish you the best of luck!
thanks.. since it seems i can't afford to move out.. i think i'll just stay in the closet then.. it just feels like i'm lying to them.. ugh.. thanks for your help..
First of all, you don't need to come out to everybody unless you are an activists like Harvey Milk. LOL! No big deal. Remember that you want to be safe and supported. Coming out to 1-3 closed friends or whoever knows you very well who you think are open-minded and non judgmental are good enough. What's important is that you accept and love yourself. I hope you'll find a man who will accept your bisexuality. The one who'll say "I don't mind." Goodluck.
i'm actually only out to my online friends.. who are really close to me.. but none of my friends who are actually near me.. knows that i'm bisexual.. thanks.. i hope the guy i'm totally in love with really completely accepts me..
