I'm writing this because I just need to vent a little about something that happened yesterday. One of my good friends came down to my dorm room last night to visit me and my roommate. We were just hanging out and talking about random stuff when he got on a certain subject and called someone a f-ing faggot. That normally doesnt really bother me, but I was kinda in a wierd mood last night, and it really pissed me off. After he left, my roommate (who is the only one I'm out to) noticed I was in a bad mood and asked me what was wrong. I told him the reason and we talked about it for a few minutes. I ended up being in a bad mood the rest of the night, and still am a little bit. I want to tell him, but I'm afraid of how he'll react because he really dislikes gay people. I'm a really quiet person (probably the reason I dont post much on here) until I get to know people, and I have a circle of like 5 or 6 really close friends that I hang out with most of the time, who all are pretty conservative. I'm afraid that if I tell him, he might freak out and tell everyone else and they'll think differently about me. Its just really hard having to hide who I am... I just needed to let that out..thanks for reading
Instead of expressing your outrage in terms of yourself, you can always use us as a proxy. "Look, I've got several gay friends, and hearing someone use a term like 'fucking faggot' pisses me off. Can you not use that term around me?" Lex
Mmmm, not to be hatin' on that or anything lex, but ive been in his situation and ive seen people say almost identical replies like that. In almost every case it ended with something like... "Why does it piss you off so much? Are YOU a faggot?" ...or something like that. Saying you have gay friends is almost a dead give-away that it hits a bit more close to home that your leading on Well at least this is my experience. When ALL your friends are more conservative and in this mind-set to call everything and everyone a faggot / gay, its not so simple as to say "please dont use that word". The way i actually found to deal best with it is a snappy comeback that puts them in there place. "So im guessing you practice what you preach?" "Why are you so obsessed with the word "faggot"? Maybe you are one" "It takes one to know one" Ya know, things like that can sometimes send these big tough boys running with there tails between there legs. Call them gay for using the word gay, and then they tend to stop.
I don't know your background, but maybe it now bothered you because you are growing in your acceptance of your sexual orientation. How did your roommate handle it - I mean he's the one living with you? Maybe that is a clue of how your good friends will handle it. Maybe talk to your roommate some more about it since he's the only one you are out to. Explore your options.
I think you may be right about that. I definately think I'm at least a little more comfortable talking about it. My roommate took it really well...he pretty much said he'll always be my friend. One reason why I think my other friend may not take it as well is because his mom is a religion nazi and says the devil is in pretty much everything, so who knows how much of that has sunk in with him.
