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Coming out to sister needing help

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Ruben7173, Nov 12, 2016.

  1. Ruben7173

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    Hi, so a week earlier my sister came from switzerland to spends a week and a half and yesterday i was with her and a friend of her, and she asked me if i had any girlfriends and i said no... her friend then said to my suster how about boys? then my suster asked that, i said no.. Then she started saying to her friend that she has no problems with gay people, but finds the things they do gross and unnatural, after all the things she said, she said one last thing that if she were to be saying the truth she would have said any of those things she said earlier, she said if im gay she would still support me, but she wouldnt be as much around me than she is now... that is just something horrible to say and made me wanna cry... what do i do?

    ---------- Post added 13th Nov 2016 at 12:20 AM ----------

    forgot to say and cant seem to edit, so continuation:" I have came out to some of my friends and they support me, i also came out only to my mother and she also supports me and wanted to come out to my sister to but after what she said i dont know if i should..."
     
  2. Romancer

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    Why do you care so much about what your sister thinks? If it's just because she is your sister, then I don't think that's a good enough reason to deny who you really are. It sounds as if everyone you have come out to so far has been very supportive which is amazing. Not everyone is that lucky. You can't expect everyone to be supportive though, you have to be willing to accept the good and the bad when you come out. You have had mostly good so far, with the exception of your sister, so consider yourself blessed and let your sister handle it however she needs to. Remember, her feelings about this say much, much more about her than it does about you!
     
  3. Ruben7173

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    i guess you're right, ill come out to her and if she supports and still loves me thats fine, if she doesnt, i hope she gets over it and remember im still her brother and nothing changed.
     
  4. Romancer

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    You really should. The bottom line is this (in my opinion): You must live your life the way you feel is right for you. Do you want to go through life making other people happy by having them think you are someone you are not and hiding your true feelings, or do you want to live YOUR life the way YOU want to? Do you want to look back 10 years from now and see that all or most of your relationships with other people were based on lies or that they were based on the truth? Do you want to die (many, many years from now of course!) and see that you were never really who you wanted to be?

    Answer these questions and I think you will figure out what you need to do about coming out.

    Coming out is almost always painful, but eventually you will feel a sense of freedom that you never had before you came out. If you do not come out, your pain will go on and on and on. The choices are some pain now, followed by happiness and freedom, or a lifetime of never ending pain because you were not true to yourself....