Hi, I'm a teenage bisexual female and I really don't see why I should come out. It's not really that I have anything to fear from my parents, who are fairly progressive, but I just really don't want to come out and don't see why I should. I'm not interested in dating at this point--focusing on school--and even if I was I wouldn't be able to because thus far, the only people I've been attracted to are straight girls and gay guys. I don't have to change my behavior in any way to hide it. I've never actually had to lie to my parents, because the only sexuality-related question they've ever asked since I realized I'm bi was "are there any guys you like," to which the honest answer was no, because at the time, and for several months before, I was crushing on a girl and no one else. I don't feel like I'm being 'fake' or hiding my true self in any way. In some ways, I don't even really think of myself as 'in the closet.' I have told one person, because he directly asked, not because he suspected but as sort of an afterthought to an 'are you interested in any guys' question. He was surprised, but totally cool with it. If my parents ever asked, I would definitely tell them. And honestly, I am kind of ambivalent about my sexuality. My reaction to realizing was something along the lines of "Oh. Okay. Good to know." I just don't really see it as an integral part of who I am, any more than being caucasian is. I don't think my personality or beliefs are any different than they would be if was straight or were before I knew I am bi. The one fear I have is that my parents might be hurt when they find out later-they're bound to eventually--either by me telling them or some other way, that I didn't tell them sooner/didn't tell them at all. Is this a legitimate fear? I really don't know if they would be. So, are there reasons that I'm not thinking of to tell my parents, or is the above enough in and of itself, or is there really just no point? I'd really appreciate any advice y'all have.
That's a perfectly normal way to view it and I'm in a similar boat as you. Your sexuality doesn't always have to define who you are as a person. Deep inside, you're just another normal person. The only difference is that you are romantically attracted to different people. I would consider myself partially out. I don't go around flaunting my sexuality like some people do. But if people ask in any shape of form, I will tell them. Like if they ask me if I have a girlfriend, I'll say no because I'm gay. I just don't see it as important as some people think it is. If someone does ask you a similar question, I would take that opportunity and come out to them as you seem comfortable doing so.
I agree... . I came out to family and friends... only because those are the people I am close to. Others... well... if they ask, I tell.. .but not always. I sort of assess the situation. I don't flaunt my sexuality at all... some have even said it's like I am back in the closet. Meh... I just shrug and move along. It should not be pressurized at all. Only if and when you are comfortable. Best of luck.
