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came out to my mom

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by CL1990, Dec 8, 2016.

  1. CL1990

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    Hi!

    I posted about how I came to my mum a couple weeks ago. I live abroad so I called her and told her. she took it well but yesterday talking to her she made me feel very angry as she said "I was a coward for not coming out to my brother or the rest of the family". I know she only wants me to be ok but it hurt a lot. I feel like I really cant share how depressed I am because she thinks me liking girls is "not a big deal" but the way I see it its a big challenge....

    I am thinking that, since I am going through therapy and will start a support group next week, I really don't want to talk about this to anyone else for now as I am extremely vulnerable and everyones opinions just blurs my judgement...do you think I am being selfish?
     
  2. Chiroptera

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    Heya CL1990,

    It is great that she took it well, but she needs to understand that this process can be tough to most people.

    If she says something like this again (or if you want to), talk to her, respectfully but firmly, and tell her that you appreciate her support, but that you prefer to take the coming out process slowly, and she should respect your decision.

    There's nothing selfish about this.
     
  3. Linkmaste

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    Everyone has their own coming out method that works for them. Her calling you a coward wasn't very nice nor a supportive way to help you. Just know you're very brave a true opposite of a coward.
     
  4. beenthrdonetht

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    With all due respect to your mom, she was the selfish one. I know it just muddies up the waters even more (sorry! I feel for you) to have ambivalent feelings about a parent, she behaved very badly. I hope things get better.