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Coming Out Advice A supportive place to ask for and give advice about coming out. Includes a sub-forum for posting stories about your coming out experiences.

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Old 9th Apr 2009, 08:50 PM   #1
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Default Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hey everyone, I'm pretty new to this site so I just wanted to introduce myself. This seems like a nice forum with great people

So yeah in regards to the whole sexuality thing, I've been questioning it a whole lot lately. Since around year 9 I've thought about it and off, but only recently have I been thinking that the reality might be that I'm a lesbian. When I think back on it, there have been no guys that on first meeting I've been, "woahhh. he is amazing". But I can think of a few girls I've met this year who have made me have that reaction.

If I was to say I was gay, I know my friends would be really supportive. Some would be quite suprised (I don't really fit the stereotype of lesbians that's portrayed in the media), but overall I'm pretty sure they'd be supportive. At least then they'd stop trying to set me up with guys! As for my family, that's a little more complicated. I've come to the conclusion that they are fine with homosexuality, as long as it's not me.

I have a feeling my mum might suspect it. We were watching Oprah the other day about a lesbian woman who left her husband (who ended up coming out as gay too lol). Don't know how it came about but mum said, "You're not gay are you????" to which I replied, "hah nooooo". So yeah...

I'm at University now, and I just graduated from a lovely little catholic all-girls school, so I haven't had a whooole lot of experience with guys...right now I guess I'd just like to meet a girl. Try it out. See how it goes. Then I'd be able to have this all more straight in my mind. did many of you know you were gay before ever being in a relationship? I've been on a few dates with guys here and there but nothing serious.

Anyway, sorry about the chunk of text. I'm happy I've found this place, nice to meet you all
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Old 9th Apr 2009, 08:54 PM   #2
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hello and welcome to EC!!
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Old 10th Apr 2009, 03:42 AM   #3
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Quote:
Originally Posted by mannix View Post
If I was to say I was gay, I know my friends would be really supportive. Some would be quite suprised (I don't really fit the stereotype of lesbians that's portrayed in the media)
Not every lesbian is a plaid-wearing boot butch! Some are, but most aren't, and I can honestly say my gaydar is absolutely awful for girls because the vast majority of queer girls I've ever met are quite femme. Admittedly I'm not, but that's a whole other matter.

Quote:
I'm at University now, and I just graduated from a lovely little catholic all-girls school, so I haven't had a whooole lot of experience with guys...right now I guess I'd just like to meet a girl. Try it out. See how it goes.
If your university has an LGBT society/club, that would be a perfect opportunity to get to know other queer girls. Just go with the flow, and do what makes you happy
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Old 10th Apr 2009, 05:52 AM   #4
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hey - welcome!

I'm sure you'll find a bunch of people you can relate to here.
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Old 10th Apr 2009, 08:12 AM   #5
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hi there and welcome to EC. I'm sure that you'll find people that you can relate to here.

I actually got married before coming to the conclusion that I was gay. I don't really think you need to try out both to know. Instead I think you need to be really honest with yourself. You're on a path to do that. Good for you!
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Old 11th Apr 2009, 06:06 AM   #6
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Thanks for the welcome guys. And I just realised that I posted this in the wrong section, sorry!
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Old 11th Apr 2009, 07:39 AM   #7
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

welcome to the EC family,coming out to us is your first step,with a load of wonderful people and all types of experience at your finger tips,just ask,were here to help and listen,have fun.
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Old 11th Apr 2009, 08:21 AM   #8
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

welcome enjoy Ec
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Old 11th Apr 2009, 08:29 AM   #9
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Welcome to the Family!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 11th Apr 2009, 12:53 PM   #10
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hello and welcome, yes its great here
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 04:27 AM   #11
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Another Aussie!! Yay!!!!

Anyway...welcome to EC Mannix

You'll be sure to find alot of people here who've gone through/ are going through the same situation. So don't be afraid to ask questions because we're all here to help.

It's good that you're looking into your sexuality & trying to find what's right for you. I've never felt blown off my feet by guys either. I did cave in & date a few, but the relationships didn't last because I wasn't truly attracted to them, I just wanted to see if I could do it. But it turns out I couldn't & I'm happy with that because I think women are gorgeous

I'm glad to hear that you know you're friends would be supportive if you came out to them. Receiving a positive response will make the process that little bit easier. You mentioned some may be shocked. If they are, so be it. Everyone will react differently. The only important thing is that they accept you. After all, you're not changing in any way, you're just sharing another part of who you are.

Parents can be a tricky subject when it involves talking about sexuality. I myself have come out to my mum, dad & brother, but not any other member of the family. I suggest reading through the coming out section because parents are a hot topic. You might find something useful amongst the posts

As for getting some more experience in the area, I agree with Apocolypte in regards to approaching a GLBT club at your university. It's a good start in getting some face-to-face support & even getting to know other GLBT members.

Good luck & keep us posted on how things are going
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 05:07 AM   #12
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hey! There are quite a few of us here in similar situations. I've never been with a girl or a boy in any sort of semi-serious way so I'm pretty unsure at the moment too. But it is also possible to be sure even though you're inexperienced. Both are fine. Either way, the best thing is to try (it's hard, I know) not to get too uptight about the whole thing, but to just go with the flow and enjoy meeting whoever comes along.

I agree with apocalypte that your university's LGBT society would be a good place to start to meet other queer girls.
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 02:16 PM   #13
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

This is me waving "hi"

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Old 13th Apr 2009, 02:28 PM   #14
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

Hey and welcome to EC!

My mam is always giving me the question "You're not gay are you??" aswell.

Good Luck!

x
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Old 13th Apr 2009, 09:16 PM   #15
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Default Re: Just introducing myself, sorry it's so long!

welcome you will love it here
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