Hey guys! DISCLAIMER: I'll try not to offend anyone here, sorry in advance if I do I also apologize for my tendency to ramble. So I've recently discovered that I identify as gender-fluid, and feel the need to 'come out'. I wouldn't feel the need to do, but I don't feel comfortable closeted, and I need to get this weight off my shoulders. I am biologically female, but as a kid I was pretty much allowed to be into whatever. My parents are pretty accepting, so I think I'd still have a safe place to live/financial support. I've never revealed secrets of this nature to them (i.e my lack of religion), so I've got no idea where to start. I plan to tell my friends first, as I know that they can keep secrets and will support me (I hope). Within my immediate family, my biggest concern is having to explain. I am next to positive that they are not familiar with the term 'gender-fluid' (although one never does know), and I'm not sure how to explain it to them. I am contemplating printing some of my favorite articles explaining the term, or simply giving them the website names. My other concern is figuring out how to tell them. I'm not very good at sitting people down and explaining stuff like this to them; I typically say something on accident and that's how they find out. My other concern after my parents and closest friends is my extended family. They are not priority on my list of people to tell my darkest secrets to, but chances are they will ask questions when they see me looking like a guy (or anything other than a girl). My mom's parents are extremely religious and against LGBT+ community. They would not like me being anything other than cis-gendered , and would probably never speak to my family again (I hate to imagine what would happen if they knew I was an atheist...). I typically would not even think of saying anything to them other than the fact that I'll be sharing a house with them for an entire week, and if I end up feeling like a guy (it's a pretty noticeable transition, and it'll be even more so when I cut my hair) and they will probably say something (or someone else will. The possibilities of my secrets becoming uncovered are endless!). I will probably wait some time before telling anyone other than my friends, but I will defiantly need some time to plan before even asking them to talk. I appreciate you taking the time to read this, and thank you for your help. Have a great day, Parker
I think that my question is on how to tell them/when to tell them. Any stories you have would help a lot as well. Thanks again!
All I can say is take your time. Just take it one day at a time. Don't rush it. Don't feel pressured to do anything fast.
Being cis I am not sure if my advice means anything, but as far as telling your extended family goes, I would just let your gender expression speak for you, If you are a guy and dress like a guy, just let that be the explanation you give them. "I am gender fluid, and I feel like a guy today." and that's it. Sorry if this is really crappy advice, I am having trouble expressing my thoughts today.
Everybody is different, but personally I find it easier to tell people individually, also, try answering any questions they have in person because then you can be sure they have the information they need. Hope this helps!
