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Need Advice: Coming out and crushes

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Artist Girl, Feb 18, 2017.

  1. Artist Girl

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    So I need some help with two things. The first thing is coming out. Which everybody needs help with, but still. I'm 13 and am bisexual, but I don't know how to tell my parents. It's bugging me a lot, since I know I'm bi and I've told several people already, but insubstantial no idea how. My sister came out as bicromatic over text, but I don't really want to do it that way. I've told my closer friends, most of which are also bi, but I have no idea how to bring it up or anything. My family isn't religious and I'm not worried about them not accepting me, but I just can't figure out how to say it. I don't really want to text them and don't want to make a big deal about it like bake a cake with the flag inside, which they probably wouldn't get anyway. Thoughts? My second problem I kinda don't want to deal with and I need help on how. I have this friend, and she has openly told me that she like me. Like, a lot. And I don't really know if I like her back. It's like, I sometimes think like "Oh yeah, I'd date her," but other times it's like "Eh, she's not really what I'm looking for." But she's kinda pushy and won't take "kinda" as an answer when she asks if I like her back. The thing is, I used to tell her my crushes, but I don't really anymore. The first time I likes this popular guy and she told two of her friends who I wasn't very close to at the time but am much more close to now. Then I got over him after a while and I started liking one of her friends, and told her about it. She then goes to the crush and tells her I like her, and her excuse was that she likes one friend who liked a different friend. But now she still likes me and I don't really know what to say. I said that I could see myself liking her in the future, but I don't know if that wasn't a good thing to say? I would like if you didn't respond to this with "You're only 13, you're sill getting to know yourself" because I've heard that and I know. If someone has a similar situation or has advice on how to deal with either of these, please tell me. Thanks:icon_bigg
     
  2. deepwaters7

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    Your first problem, I can completly relate to. I don't think actually telling them is the complicated part, it's bringing it up. I can see people saying to just say something along the lines of "Can I tell you something" or "I have to tell you something" but I'd say just wait for the perfect moment and be prepared for almost anything
     
    #2 deepwaters7, Feb 18, 2017
    Last edited: Feb 18, 2017
  3. Geochick96

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    As far as coming out, you have to be prepared to just go with flow, I had this great plan of how I was going to tell my parents and then a couple days before I was going to tell them, my mom caught me posting a reply to another thread and asked what I was doing, so I just told her and she was really cool about it.

    The point is you gotta go with the flow, just be confident in yourself, and if you don't feel ready, that's ok too, it is your coming out. :thumbsup:
     
  4. Renegades

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    Don't feel the need to rush in coming out. When the time comes, you will know what to say. If you think you are 100% prepared for any reaction, go for it. And there are really no right words to use when coming out to someone. It really depends on the type of person everyone in the situation is. It will probably be awkward, but trust me, life will ave much more awkward situations. I've been in similar situations, so I've been there. You want to come out, but don't know how to say it. Find a peaceful time to do it when there is no extra tension. I made the mistake of coming out to my mom during a fight in the car, and our relationship was immensely awkward until she sat down to talk with me about it. And in the situation with your friend, you should really talk to her, explain the gentlest/best way you can think of about what you feel about her now, or what you might feel in the future. I know you don't want to hear it, but it is true that you must figure yourself out before jumping into anything. Maybe you don't feel or think about something now, but you might in the future. No matter what you think, you don't know exactly who you are or what you want when so young. I am 16 now, and I thought I knew basically everything about myself when I was 13. Discovering that I didn't was a hard truth to face, but accepting that has helped me grow as a person, and grow into my queer identity(though I am still figuring that out too!). I apologize if this wasn't exactly what you are looking for, but only you will really know what to do in any of your situations.