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Should I come out?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Cosm1cNova, Feb 24, 2017.

  1. Cosm1cNova

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2017
    Messages:
    15
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I wanna come out to my parents as trans. A few years ago I did mention briefly that I was trans but they said I was too young. It's been a few years and I still feel the same way. I know that i am a guy but I'm worried I may never pass because I havent come out, and my mom wont let my hair be cut short but since im trans its a valid reason to get it cut, and also I cant order a binder because I dont have my own bank account, so ill have to come out and then order it but I'm afraid they'll say the same thing, even though its been a few years and i still know that im trans. The hardest person to tell in my opinion was my boyfriend but thats out of the way and we're still dating, but I'm worried about telling my parents. Do you have any advice?
     
  2. Smile44

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 22, 2017
    Messages:
    37
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Bronx
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    How is your relationship with your parents? Will they support you? You know your parents better than anybody, so you should be able to answer these questions. If your parents will love you unconditionally then yes tell them. But if you've seen through past experiences that they will not be a support system then don't tell them and wait until you have everything you need to be able to move out on your own. Some kids come out to their parents and they get kicked out the house. Or the parents are so against it that the relationship between the parent and child becomes strained. So really you have to sit back and ask yourself, how will my parents react to this news? If you see them rejecting the idea of you being trans then proceed with caution. It's better to be in a good place by omitting the truth, than be in a strained relationship with people you have to be around every day. The younger generation has to understand that the older generation grew up in different times. Patience and observation is your best bet right now. Secretly observe your parents giving them just small amounts of the truth and see how they handle it. Like you can make a comment about the subject of homosexuality in a matter of fact way and see how they reply. I say homosexuality because a lot of folks don't understand to much about transgender issues. So maybe start off with homosexuality, something they may understand. Or you can talk about transgenders because that just may make them ask positive questions. Just go slow and take notes on how they react. Good Luck!!!!
     
  3. Cosm1cNova

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2017
    Messages:
    15
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Thank you !! And good news, I'm out! I asked my mom if I could get a haircut, and she asked if I wanted to be a boy again because i was like this a few years ago. I just simply replied "I was going to tell you." So its okay!! She said she always had this slight knowledge (?) of me being trans and she accepts me and so does my dad. I'm getting a binder and my haircut soon :slight_smile: