I do think I have gender dysphoria, but I do fear going in to see a doctor. I haven't been to a doctor in years, and never really had any reason to. My family's never really had to deal with anything like this. I don't think they've had much interaction with LGBT people at all. As far as I remember, anyway. What didn't help was my father's constant badgering of me to be a man, and him scolding if I wasn't man enough, or both of my parents saying how I wasn't raised right. It doesn't happen really much now, but I don't know why, but I always felt uncomfortable with him saying I had to be "the man of the house" or something. My parents always said how I was way too effeminate (and because of stuff like this, I have some forced masculinity). And well, a lot of people in my life do say stuff like this. And while it could just be that, I'd really like to get this settled. But like I said, because of my parents' more traditional family thoughts, I do fear what they may think. Granted, they seem to fall more in the liberal mold and might be more accepting, I really don't want to risk it. My relationship with my parents is pretty shaky as it is, especially now. I barely even talk to them much at this point. I don't have much friends anymore, but I'm sure at least a few will be accepting. I've already lost enough people in my life, and I'd rather not lose anymore. I'm constantly trying to take slow steps with this, but... I don't really know if I should. I always want to just try to forget about it and move on. But I do feel, along with this, and my ongoing (not diagnosed) depression, I really need to get myself in a more mentally stable fashion. It's getting in the way of my life. So, any advice on how to go about this? I don't feel like I can just bring it up to them out of the blue. I'll be obliged for anything I can get.
