I'm 90% sure I'm gay even though my brain is playing tricks on me and causing me to keep doubting myself, I know I am not interested in girls though so I kind of know deep down. But basically today I was on my bus home from school with a couple of my friends, one of whom has just broken up with his gf so we happened to start talking about it. It got on to the topic of my friends asking me how I felt about the fact that a girl they think I fancy just got into a relationship and I said it didn't bother me. (For many reasons). They know that something is bothering me (coming to terms with being possibly gay) and were trying to get me to say it the whole journey home. I came so close to saying that I'm not interested in girls but every time I just froze up. They were saying that I'd feel better if I told them but I just couldn't. I felt ready to say it then but I couldn't get the words out. It's just such a frustrating situation. One moment I'm ready to accept I'm gay and move forward and the next I slump back into "but what if you're not cause you've never really crushed on a guy". It's literally on my mind all the time. What should I have done in that situation? Cause I felt like I could have said it but now I'm home I feel unsure again. Arghhh! :bang:.
I can sympthaize. You're ready to come when you're ready to come out. Don't let anyone pressure you into anything. I've already come out and the doubts are still there. I still have to hide being openly attracted to guys. It drives me nuts. I had never dated a guy before so when I came out it was met with skepticism but I knew I did not have to date a man to know I fancied them over females. Keep your head up. When it's time to tell you'll just know. Take care and blessings Alec
You should take life slowly. Try to be present in the moment. Don't be in a hurry to figure out who you are today. It is common to question your sexuality in life. Questioning and understanding your sexuality is a process that takes time. That's all the advice that I can think of giving you. If you have any other questions, feel free to send me a private message or a wall message. I wish you luck.
If you'd like backsies on that moment, you can take it. Just text one of the friends who was on the bus with you. "You know what you were trying to make me say on the bus? I kind of think that's true. But I'm still coming to grips with it." If you'd rather NOT go that route, that's fine. Just keep taking steps so you can get to that point. Lex
Well, we were talking again on PlayStation and they were trying to guess what was wrong and one of them said "he's gay" and I didn't react and the conversation sorta spiralled from there. :lol: I said I could be gay but not 100% sure yet and how my mind keeps wavering from acceptance to denial. But they were really cool with it which was really great! Just gotta work on acceptance and making my brain not confused!
I think that you were right not to say it. If you are not 100% positive then don't make it public. You can't exactly go back in the closet if you are doubting yourself so just wait until you have conformation.
Glad they were all cool with it. From the sound of it they'd already guessed and had discussed between themselves and were genuinely trying to help. Take your time, no need to go completely public until you're comfortable.
