I'm in a really hard situation. I've been questioning my sexuality for a while now, and have had a boyfriend through the entire process. He's been sweet and understanding, but I never had the guts to tell him that I thought I was gay. Now that I'm about 100% sure about it, I feel as though I should tell him. Whenever we have intercourse, I just don't feel any emotion from it. I'm not enjoying it. I actually feel repulsed whenever I think about having intercourse with a guy. I know he loves me, and I love him, but not in that way. I'm not sure how to tell him, because even though he says he's okay with it, I know it's going to hurt him. I really don't know what to do or to say. I've been stressing about this for about two weeks, and can't keep acting like everything is okay and that I'm totally in love with him. Please help me and thank you for at least reading this.
A bit confused by this part: "I'm not sure how to tell him, because even though he says he's okay with it, I know it's going to hurt him." This suggests he already knows...at least, to some extent. Does he? Yes, you're going to hurt him. ANY time you break up with somebody, you're going to hurt that person, no matter what the reason is. But the longer you remain in the relationship, the harder the breakup is going to be...and the longer you're keeping BOTH of you from going out to find somebody you can BOTH be happy with. It's tough to give specific guidelines on how to break up with somebody. For some, being factual and clinical works best. Other times, you need to speak with the heart. I'd say you just need to meet at his place, and just start right off by saying "I'm really sorry, but we need to break up." Then go into your reasons why. It will hurt - no question. But the sooner the hurt, the sooner you both can start healing. Lex
It does sound confused. We've always been very open with each other, and I told him I was struggling with my sexuality. I told him I liked girls, and still loved him. And at the time I did. He understood that I liked both, but now I'm just into girls. So yes, he knows to an extent about me. It's just the part of telling him that I'm into girls only. I hope that cleared things up. I'm really groggy right now and am having trouble thinking straight, so if it didn't, I'm sorry. But thank you nonetheless for answering and giving me advice. I will definitely do it soon.
Then it at least won't come as an utter shock to him. Just tell him the more thought you give it, the more you're convinced that you're completely gay. Lex
