I came out to one of my friends and he doesn't accept that I'm gay. He laughed and said that there was no way I was gay because he said that all gay guys have always been attracted to other guys and hit on them all the time like straight guys do with the girls. The thing is that I have never been attracted to girls. I have never asked any of them out or ever pointed any "good-looking" ones out to anyone ever and he knows this so I don't know what he's talking about. He says that since I've never asked any guy out then I'm not really gay. The problem I'm having is that I don't know who is gay and who isn't other than the guys who are "over-the-top-floating-around-giving-designer-clothes-advice-to-others-and-then-talk-about-how-they'll-get-fat-eating-a-muffin" kind of guys and I don't find those types attractive. Also he says since I've watched straight porn before than I must be straight. The thing is that straight porn is really the only porn that is easily available anywhere and even then I was always interested in the guys. Also he says that I could never pull-off being gay since he says that all gays guys like to go clubbing, do ecstasy to have orgies, and only stay in relationships for like 2 weeks before moving on. I really am not big on going out dancing and I don't drink or do drugs. He says it's because of this that I will never succeed as a gay person and should just be straight. I know I am gay and that he is wrong but how can I make him realize this?
Okay? You should seriously just punch your friend right in the face.... or at least tell him to get informed. Your friend can't decide if you're straight or gay... and he just threw some terrible gay-stereotypes at you. Not every gay guy does or must do drugs and clubbing and orgies... that's plain nonsense. It is as if I said: "Every straight guy has porn hidden under his bed," or "every straight guy plays football- and if they don't they'll never succeed in life and they are condemned to a life of misery." No, that would be plain nonsense, too. And one can never decide whether to be straight or gay. If he's your friend he should love for who you are and not try to change you. There are certain people that just deny what they don't like, or what they can't understand. Help him undestrand. I suggest you talk with him... maybe he's shocked and having trouble dealing with the fact that he has a gay friend. Tell him/help him to get informed about the real gay lifestyle... and let him ask questions. If this goes well, he'll realize that there is actually nothing wrong with being gay. Good luck!
He's wrong, and he needs to know that he's wrong. I'd tell him that the media gives a really false impression of what it's like to be gay, and that liking guys and not girls means that you're gay, no matter what you look like, what your hobbies are, what your personality is.
Good answer,Pokerface. You said it all! You're absolutely right,this guy has no idea what he's talking about. Depending how close this friendship is,I agree to let him know that most gay people are NOT like he thinks.If your friendship isn't that important,let him think what he wants to think.He's going to,anyway.
This guy is seriously deluded and close minded if he thinks that being gay is just one big massive stereotype. If he is worth anything to u as a friend then maybe you could give him som e reading material to show him that actually being gay comes in all types. He needs to be educated.
(this might not be the best response. actually i'm fairly sure its pretty stupid. what can i say, this is my brain at 11pm ) Next time you see him, ask him if he'll go out with out with you. Then ask him if you've proved your gay. Although you shouldn't have to prove it to you friends in the first place!
tell him that everything that he thinks about gay ppl is a stereotype. not all of us are like that. in fact, most are the exact opposite. u need to let him know that and what your thinking.
Pokerface said it all right there; your friend seems to be either in denial or is very uninformed; help him though it. True friends ought to at least accept the fact. Good luck, he'll come round I'm sure
um... why not shrug off his opinion...? and then the next time that he calls to hang out or whatever, things will be normal cause you haven't changed. Really the only time there would be an incident is if you were on a date, or he called to hang out and you couldn't cause you were on a date. involving the gaydar... try going to the gym, or noticing the ones who are looking at other's crotches. if there is someone you like, swallow your pride and talk to them. Atleast then you can say you tried.
