I have tried coming out to my mom, but she thinks that this is all a phase. I, and my friends, know for a fact that i am truly gay because of how i act, talk, feel, and do. I want to come out to my dad, but i am very scared. I think he has a hunch, because i give him hints and act gay around him, but i still dont know what to do. Help? I want to come out to the rest of my family by the end of high school, but once again im scared of what they will do. I am the youngest in my family, and i think that my family will (like my mom) thinks its a phase or that im experimenting things. They might also think that i dont truly know what im talking about, since im so young. But part of me thinks they will support me since a majority of my family is Democrat and LGBT supporters, but i still have Republican family members that i dont know if support LGBT rights. Help? All my friends know, as they were the ones i came out to first. They supported me through everything, and even gave me the courage to come out to my mom which didnt turn out well as you can see ^
I came out to my mum and she thought it was a phase too. She's working on accepting me, because I told her that I wanted to go back into therapy and that she should talk to my therapist too. Honestly, it really comes down to how you feel in your gut. It's a hard decision, but remember, you don't need to come out to everyone at once. Try again with your mother at some point, and then talk to others you know are generally positive about the subject. When it comes to those in your family whose views you're unsure of, I would say wait, and if your immediate family accepts you maybe ask them how they think the rest of the family would react. Once again though, only do this if you really do think you're ready and they'll accept you. If you have an underlying feeling that something will go wrong, don't let your need to be out force you to come out. It's annoying to wait, but it's worth it. However, if you have support, go for it mate I hope everything works out for you!
Dear friend, Coming out at any age is a personal challenge and very stressful. It's all about the "fear" of the unknown reactions or rejections. You are fortunate to live in this generation where people are far more educated, understanding and accepting. Many of the old stereotypes of gay people as seen as an extreme. I came out at 18 (1976). Times were different. My mom didn't know what the word "gay" meant. It was horrible so I ran back to he closet for 40 years of unbearable inter-struggles. First accept yourself, then when you are comfortable tell other, only if you need to. Most people don't care and you don't need the acceptance of others to accept yourself. I wish you health and peace and a long GAY happy life.
Secret Comander....you got some really good advice from dyl pickle. At your age you are very dependent on your parents, if there is a chance that they will reject your sexuality and/or try to have you "fixed"...don't do it! You should be able to come out when you are ready and to the people that you want to know. I have only come out to a few close friends...on my own time and only to those whom I chose. I am so proud of you and dyl pickle, both of you are mature far beyond your years. Very few straight guys ever understand themselves as well as both of you do. Those of us who have had to accept that we are different than other guys, have also had to look inward and work to understand ourselves. That is something that very, very few straight guys ever do. I am so very proud to call both of you "brothers". My generation had to hide to survive, I am so glad that you do not....David
Before I told me friends I was so terrified but I was pleasantly surprised by most of their reactions. If you're scared to tell your dad I'd probably wait until you are able to give him some space if he does react badly. That's what I'm doing, I'm waiting to be able to live alone and not be dependant on my parents so they have time and space to adjust to me being gay. I hope this is of any help. Liam
