momsy...:(

i know my mum n dad hate gays and bisexuals so i plan never to tell them. im with my boyfriend so to them nothing is different. they know me and my best friend are close but not as close as that.
i think mibbe you should take a step back now that she knows. at least now you have nothing to hide. xxx

 

She's just in total denial right now. She should be proud of you for being an openly LGBT teenager. That's very brave of you. Don't worry, she will eventually get over it. You need to somehow show her that homosexuality is purely genetic and there is nothing you can do about it. There is definitely proof that it is the truth. I started feeling homosexual feelings when I was six years old. That was before I even knew what homosexuality was. I wish you the best of luck with this. Being LGBT can be a real bitch sometimes.

 

jees she does love you, its just that it takes time for some people to accept things, and in the end she'll either accept you for who you are, or she wont, just get her some info on it, remember parents aren't as smart as they make themselves out to be, and it'll be ok, just give it time.

 

Try a little bit to understand her. She's receiving a shock. I mean, she considered you and a husband as the only possibility for you to have a happy life, not with a woman. She's new to the idea, her expectations have been debunked. Give her a little time.

 

(*hug*) Im sorry shes not so accepting right now. Believe me, ive been there and still am there. The most important thing i can tell you though is give it time, because she will get better. All you can really do is help her on the path to acceptance by educating her. I recommend showing her this for starters: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYMjXucTFaM&feature=related and then maybe follow up with some PFLAG material (im not an expert on that, ask Becky )

The way you handled this does not seem to be very good though First off, never lie or exaggerate or such the facts about homosexuality. You want to deal in only truth when your talking to her about something so important. Telling her its chemical but not really knowing what your talking about is going down a dangerous path. If you dont know yourself, then its time you watch some videos and read some material and learn Knowledge is your greatest weapon against homophobia. As for telling her about that pysch study, true on not, your bound to scare he with it. Until she is more accepting, calling HER a dyke in any way (big or small) is going to scare her shitless and send her into a defensive mode. Homophobic people take such offense to being called gay.

And finally, i DO think she still loves you. I know you cant see it because your blinded by the hurtful things she said to you, but parents dont just hate there children that quickly and easily. Shes most likely just disappointed your not straight. She could be thinking she did something wrong or forgot to do something right and blaming herself. Its going to be a tricky while for her trying to figure it all out. Just never doubt that she will always love you. In the end most parents would still rather have a gay or lesbian child than no child at all.

 

As others have said, she may simply need some time to absorb these things. For a few people, even the discovery that their child is gay or bi isn't enough to offset years of cultural conditioning that have taught them that gay and bi equals bad. Don't argue with your mother on this point for the time being. Let it sit, and get back to being a great daughter.

Lex

 

I'm just repeating what everyone else has said, but let it sit with her for a while. Ask yourself too, "how many gay people does she know?" The preconceptions we have about people go away 98% of the time once they get to know them.

You may want to tell your mom that you are the same as you have always been...you're just this (gay) now too.(!)

 

I notice your profile says you are out to more people in your family.

How are they taking the news? I would say just let her have time to adjust. I came from a moderate chirstian family, and my mom, who I am very close to needed time to adjust to thinking about me differently. my dad took months, and basically was like "how can you know if you havent had sex with a guy".

now, nearly a year later *a year mid june*, he finally told me "I now understand why you are gay," and I tensed up, and was like "and that is?" and his responce was "because thats just who you are."

I wanted to cry, but it took about 7-8 months for him to come to that. I didnt push the issue, I just let him think about it at a pace he is comfortable.

Of course not everyone will be like that. Some people cant change.

However, just give your mother time to take it all in, and help her to see that you arent a different person then you had always been, she just is seeing you in a different light.

 

I know I've written this before,so please,bear with me.
My mom was a pain in the ass,when I came out. (you know,"it's a phase,you're to young to decide this",blah,blah.)
After a while,she came to her senses! Now she's my biggest cheerleader!
She WILL NOT put up with people talking shit about gay people! She loses her mind!
Even where she works,if someone says anything against us,she'll bite their head off. And she lets them know that her daughter is gay and they better NEVER say anything like that,in front of her,again!
Believe me,if my mom can be positive,I have huge hope for other parents,as well!
Once again,just give her time. It'll be okay.