All my life I've assumed I was straight and then a few years ago I started having these thoughts and I thought they were just like hormones acting up and I was just going through a phase (lol) but these feelings are still here and basically I'm starting to accept that I'm bi. And I've been finding myself really wanting to talk about it with people and just be completely open and I have this friend group who I'm really open and honest with except about this and I really want to tell them and I've gotten close and thought about it but for some reason I'm always too scared or nervous to do it. They will all accept me I know but I'm just nervous for some reason. Should I tell them? And how do I get over this fear of telling them?
Hey Josh, If/when you Come Out to someone is totally up to you, but it's important that you feel comfortable with your decision if/when you decide to Come Out. Most of us don't Come Out until we understand and accept our sexuality for ourselves. One of the key reasons for this is that only we can ever truly know what our sexuality is. The journey we make to reach that understanding and acceptance is one that we have to make alone. Others can only support us by being there for us. If we Come Out while we are still questioning, the input of others can cause of further confusion. All of that is not to say that you couldn't or shouldn't Come Out to your friends right now, if that's what you want to do. You might want to consider a couple of things before Coming Out to friends: - Are they likely to be accepting? The last thing you probably need right now is to be rejected by any of your friends simply because you are questioning your sexuality, but you seem certain that your friends will all accept you. That's great! - Can they be trusted to keep your information private/secret? (Plus, the more people that know, the greater the likelihood that word will leak out.) If you have any friends that you know are LGBTQ, then they will certainly be accepting and might be able to offer firmer support in your journey towards understanding and accepting your own sexuality. There is no simple way to get over the fear of Coming Out. It does get somewhat easier the more you Come Out and it depends on who you are Coming Out to. Parents and best friends are often the hardest people for us to Come Out to because we rely on them so heavily for unconditional love and support and we fear being judged harshly by them and possibly even rejected (even if that possibility is very small, if it were to happen, it would be devastating to us). Since you said that you are thinking that you might be Bi, here are a couple of YouTube videos that you might want to watch. They might provide you a little insight that could help you. Are You Bisexual - Quiz How to Tell if You're Bisexual - Is Bisexuality a Choice? And here's a website that you might want to check out. The Bisexual Index | What is Bisexuality? I hope some of that helps.
