Right, okay. This day took an unexpected turn. I never could've imagined that I'd be writing this post right now. So most of my friends are in a group chat on whatsapp and every now and then they use it to vent emotions by getting into a fake argument. (Boys will be boys I guess.) Knowing that I'd be "triggered", one of them suggested that gender and sex are the same thing and thus there can only be two. Anyone who felt different was allegedly 'mentally ill'. In the back of my mind, I knew he was playing a game (a dumb one, but still a game), but I was pissed off enough to go along with it and I tried to explain it, which led to him escalating it further until I was so pissed off that I came out as genderfluid in a bout of intense anger. He immediately apologised for the whole thing and everybody responded with support and acceptance and promised not to tell anyone, but it still feels... wrong. I'm glad they know, but at the same time I'm not. I wasn't ready yet. I'm not sure how to feel right now.
Coming out before you're ready is always hard... Trust that things will feel better over time, as your friends become more comfortable with it... like ripping a bandaid; if you have good friends, the worst is probably over... but it still feels a little weird, I get that.
Its probably pretty hard to come out when you're not ready (lmao how would I know, i'm in a dungeon back here). But, at least you were accepted with warm welcomes and support, rather then hate and dislike. That's probably what would have happened to me if I did that lol.
I came out like that at work last year after Pulse. then went "oh shit" then realized you cant put the toothpaste back in the tube so I said 'F' it and went on with my life, I didn't have any problems and openly speak about who I like etc.
I'm really sorry it had to happen that way. It's good that they know and that they are supportive but it sucks that you didn't feel ready, it shouldn't have gone that way. I completely understand why you did it, even though my parents aren't really homophobic, everytime I have some kind of discussion with my parents about something LGBT related and they don't agree or are close minded, I get angry and I feel like I'm going to throw all my feelings out, but then I try to calm down because that's not how I want them to find out. I hope it all works out though, at least you got that part over with
I know how risky this can be for your career, but I do think the community you live in is much more accepting than many conservative places. I understand you may be worried they will not keep your secret, but at least you have nothing to hide with them. You have a "circle of trust".
I am so sorry for your hurt feelings. We live in the heterosexual world and sadly we have to suck it up. I also hear a lot of things against LGBT. I keep quiet for now. It hurts. Things change however slowly. I'm still in the closet but at least I speak out protecting gays to keep their rights.
We all hung out at the park today and no one behaved differently and it was briefly talked about. They were very understanding and accepting. I'm regretting it less and less. I suppose I have stopped taking bs recently, and not just lgbtq+ related bs either. I'm just so sick and tired of hatred and ignorance. Watch out world, here I come!
well, this is what i'll say. maybe you weren't ready yet, and that happens. but if your friends go around and tell people behind your back, they aren't really your friends, are they? trust me, it will get better as you progress
I was put into a similar situation once and it's very uncomfortable and can also be nerve-wracking. But the thing is you're probably going to come across this a few times in your life you never really stop coming out and you can't go back in time and not come out so all you can really do is move forward. I don't know whether or not that group was just so taken back by it that they felt awkward and lied or what they really thoughts or if they truly accepted you but I don't think it really matters because the ones who care will stay by your side. I really don't know how to put this other than saying it's at least done and over with. I wish I could be different about my wording but I really don't know because there's no back in time button and sort of just that situation where you have to deal with what comes next.
