So I'm gay, and I have a boyfriend. The thing is, that my mom doesn't know I'm gay or about him, well something happened before, and I kind of said I was bi and it just bit me in the butt so I denied it and she thinks I'm straight now. But my bf's mom knows about us and shes really cool with me and treats me as her own child, and my bf and his sis are both gay lol, and when his sis came out, their mom freaked and it was hard on her, and it took her like 2 years to get over it, and she was also the first to come out lol. But what I want to do is, I want to talk to his mom and ask her for advice on what I can say to my mom so she ca take my coming out a little better than last time, but I don't know if it is a sensitive issue or if I might bring back bad memories and what not. Should I talk to her?
They may be bad memories, but I'd still ask. That mother probably has some good experiences which can impart great wisdom to you. As long as you word it politely and do it with tact, she'll probably open the floodgates of memory lane.
I agree with The Enigma. She already knows about you and you've said that she treats you as her own child. I think that if she really cares about you, like it sounds like she does, then she will definitely recognize how your mom might feel and will be really insightful on the worries and concerns of a parent. I think you should at least ask her. If she doesn't want to talk about it, then you can always drop it.
I think it'd be a really good idea. If she cares about you and has dealt with it before, I doubt she'd be mad or upset about you asking her for advice. She might even be honoured.
You're her son's boyfriend, a walking, talking reminder that he's gay, and yet she's totally cool with it. I'd say that proves she's over the bad memories. So go for it! I bet she can give useful tips!
I think it is a very good idea to talk to her. She may have been throught tough time with her children's coming out, but her current attitude seems to indicate she had overcome her own issues and that she is now completly fine with it. She might give you very good advices and I think it is a good person to have around when you'll decide to come out to your mother. Take care, Eleanor
I say talk to her! It would make a lot of sense for you. She would know what to say to make this go easier, and be there for you when it's not so easy. Plus she would feel honored I think. She seems to have gotten over her earlier feelings and emotions and would be happy to help you and your mom get through the same situation. Ask your boyfriend, see what he thinks. He knows him mom better than anyone right? Whatever decision you make I wish you the best of luck. Keep us posted! <333
