I'm kind of disgusted with myself

Hey there's nothing wrong with wanting to be liked at school, I'm in the same boat, hey I even made up stories about a boyfriend to make myself feel more like a member of the 'in crowd', and it's also one of the reasons why I haven't come out at school.
Don't think yourself the worse for it, we've all been guilty of it at some stage of our lives. The people at my new school are nicer, and I do sort of want to be accepted by them; but the people at my old school were such a**holes to me that I just thought f**k you and did my own thing.
You should remember though, the people who are worth impressing are the ones who like you because you're you, not because you're who they want you to be.

 

There is a quote that goes along the lines of "I'd prefer to be hated for who I am, than liked for who I'm not".

I figure that if people don't like me because of who I am/what I believe in/what I say or do or wear/whatever then they aren't worth my time anyway. I feel that no one should be forced to become something that they're not by their peers, no matter how old they are.

I'm not going to deny that some people may not like you (or anyone for that matter) because no one can please everyone. If you try and do that then you run the risk of losing what makes you you which is (to me anyway) one of the great joys of life.

Hopefully this helped a little bit (if not, feel free to slap me ).

 

you know they've got it right. I like to be liked and I think everyone does (only someone on a destructive warpath doesn't), but it's so much easier for people to like you if you're genuine, otherwise they may like the person they think you are and that will just become a giant charade before long. I'm not saying you have to come out, just try to be honest to yourself and as such to them about yourself. If you dont feel comfortable coming out dont, I'm just advising you not to lie to them or anything.
I hope I've been a bit of help.

 

Hey Mind Freak. I can definitely empathize with you. I always try to tell myself that I'm a strong, independent person, but when people gossip behind my back, it hurts me a lot more than it should. This fear of being ostracized from the group make me feel like shit too, and it's the only time I ever really get depressed.

In order to get rid of these stupid, paralyzing insecurities, I've tried to push my boundaries. For example, I forced myself to try out for my school's musical the past two years, I've started to confront people when I hear they've been talking behind my back and I'm joining a gay youth group in my city. I'm far from complete in my journey, but these changes have really made me more comfortable in my own skin in public. So my advice to you is try and start to force yourself to do little things that you would never have done in the past. Good luck!

 

Hey! I know exactly how you feel. One of the reasons I am not out yet is because I also care so much about what other people think and I need people to like me in order for me to be happy.
I am trying so hard to not be like this but its hard. I am slowly telling people to make it easier on myself. I tell the important people and then once that is done im just going to let other people who find out ask me and I will tell them.

 

I kind of feel this way too. I always think about what other people think of me when I'm around others. Yet somehow, I don't really care if someone likes me as a person or not. Hmm, that sounds strange right?

 

we all crave attention and to be liked by all, however, its also something you must decide whether or not people like the things about you like being bi/ gay, you are a complete package....they will like you for who you truly are.

 

It's such a tough road to negotiate, especially in high school, when everything seems so claustrophobic and freedom so far away. I think Asteroid (as usual) has it right -- just go with the deepest and truest parts of you and let everything else follow. It's impossible to be liked by everyone, but all you can do is be honest with yourself and with the people you know, and that goes a hell of a long way. People dig folks who are true to themselves. It's a good way to keep yourself sane (and neurosis-free) and to make friends.

And the haters? Eh, we're better twirlers =)

...or at least I am..

..errr...

 

Look High School = Hell. Everyone is insecure about something and wants everyone to like them. People say they don’t care, but that is a load of crap. Someone people are just better at hiding their insecurities then other. And you know that your classmates don’t know jack crap, which is a good thing. I was very insecure in high school and had a total of five friends and got picked on relentlessly. But, it only makes you stronger I am a fiercely independent person now. I have a large circle of friends, most of which say they wish they could have known me in high school. What I’m getting at is this: You seem to have things figured out pretty well for yourself. You know you’re gay and you’re cool with it. If people give you a hard time it is because they want to focus on your issues, so that no one is looking at theirs. There is life after high school and it is a great one indeed. If you’re really wigged out about coming out at school then don’t, but if you think you’re ready and you are ready for everyone else to know then onwards and upwards. Don't beat yourself up too much, plenty of people in your life will do that for you. Sorry this was so long I just ate an espresso brownie.

:icon_lol:

 

>>>People say they don’t care, but that is a load of crap.

QFT. Take a look around at your fellow classmates. And I mean a GOOD, objective look. How many look like they REALLY dress like they don't care? Even when they dress like a "slacker", you'll note that they look like all the other "slackers". VERY few wear cheap unfashionable clothes that other people aren't wearing. As much as students like to think - or like OTHERS to think - they don't care, they do.

Lex

 

Listen to Lex he is a sharp guy.