About a month ago I met this guy at a GLBT church I attend, I met him in a group of five other guys who go out for lunch after church and hang out. I started hanging out with them. I found that this guy was very cute and we had a lot in common. He is 32, a little conservative like myself, however, he use to be a male dancer at one time. i realize that he is more experienced than me at this time. When we met he somewhat dating someone, so I thought I would definitely want to work on a friendship with him. Every time I'd ask if he wanted to hang out he told me he was doing something with his boyfriend and what a great time they are having. He is no longer seeing this person and we've been talking a little more through TXT messaging, however, I have to continually make the initiative. If I don't TXT first, he doesn't. Whenever we do TXT we talk for a long time, he has very "busy" schedule, so I'm always telling him what my schedule is like and if he has the time I'd love to get together. He tells me that he'd let me know once he checks his schedule, of course he doesn't. I think I'm done with this guy. All my friends when I explain the situation tell me that he is a "player" and I don't need to waste my time. He brags about how "popular" he is and how he is never home. I think I'm going to lay off of him, be cordial but not go out of my way. If he asks why he hasn't heard from me, I'll just tell him that I never heard back from him and that for some unseen reason we have scheduling conflicts. When his schedule calms than feel free to hit me up. Other than that, I need to let it go and stop caring. :eusa_doh:
this, and this alone. seriously, sounds like he doesn't want anything to do with you, or is just a bit of a dick, so just leave it
This doesn't really strike me as a "player". A player would...well, be playing you. Expending time and energy to get you into his life, into his home, into his pants. Instead, lemme fall back onto the Greg Berehndt line - "he's just not that into you". If he was, he'd text, he'd try to set something up, he'd make time for you. He isn't, so he ain't. That's fine - just find someone who is. Lex
I would not waste anymore time on him. If he was interested in you he would take time out of his schedule to see you. I would stop texting him and look for someone who is into you.
Good idea, and good plan for what to say to him. If he really likes you, that might be the shock to the system he need to make time for you.
yea, let him go. if your schedules dont agree and hes 32 and still talks about "how popular i am and im never home" id say hes a lost cause. im sure theres someone else u can meet that may b more of what your lookin for.
I think that if I had things to brag about, I might want to do that on occasion ;-) Seriously though, I've been in the situation where it just means more to you than it does the other guy. If he's important enough to you that you are willing to put in more effort, then you can do so and see if he changes. However, the likelihood of that happening is probably pretty low. I also sometimes find, though, that the other person DOES like you, either as a friend or as an interest, but they like being sought after and enjoy the attention. Scaling back the txt's and contacts sometimes snap the other person back to reality - if he misses having the contact, he'll make the effort to do things with you. If not, then he likely isn't just that into you. Good luck.
>>>What? 32 year olds don't usually brag about how popular they are? Not any I know. They might talk about how busy they are, or how they don't have time for all the things they want to do, but I don't recall anyone over the age of 25 bragging about their popularity. Lex
Lex: I'm 25 and SO popular I can't stand it! haha just kidding! Starbucks: I agree with you. I have contacted him in two days, yet no effort from him either. So we'll see. I'm starting to move on.
32 is too damn old to b bragging about stuff like that. i think the only logical age is like, 7-12. after that, nobody cares. lol
He just seems un-interested, not a Player. But everyone else has said it better so ill stop there. Ill just drill the point in more
Maybe I have an issue with this and I don't know it, but how can you get "clingy" when you are trying to get to know someone txting them asking them how they are and carrying a convo finding out when they might like to get together. Perhaps I'm just inexperienced. All the friends I have are my friends because from the very start they are extremely honest and blunt with me. Although, it hurts, I'm the type who needs direction and I try not to assume something until someone says something. So if this guy would have thought I was being clingy or bothering, it would have been appropriate for him to tell me to lay off. I don't play games and I like honesty, tell me how I'm doing .. you know .. is that too much too ask??
Yeah - I also prefer when people just tell me if I'm pissing them off or being untoward. Some people are just better at it than others. In this case, I don't think you're being clingy, though. Although it does appear to some degree that he isn't particularly interested (which is always annoying).
