I swear to God, it's getting so hot in this damn closet

Ok, your dad knows your gay.

He just does. You watched MILK together. Lol. He ASKED you! Parents dont randomly ask there children "are you gay?" unless they are 99.9% sure. Its not a "hit and miss" type of question.

And on the bi thing, DO NOT come out as Bisexual if not just for the fact that it hurts bisexuals. When you finally "go gay" it gives in to the "all bisexuals are really just gay men or lesbian women who start off saying they are bi" stereotype that is NOT true. Dont make it harder for the bisexuals by taking a half step. Just do the full jump, please, its not fair to all my wonderful bisexual friends i know and love.

 

Well, im fully out as of 5 months now, and it was not *the* easiest experience ever, but it was the best one ever.

I was self-loathing, homophobic, depressed and suicidal just a year ago, because of my evangelical church upbringing and homophobic friends, family, teachers and pastor. I cut my wrists, i stood on my roof about to jump, blah blah blah. All that.

Fast-forward to this November/December. I started to question thing. I knew I could not change my sexuality and it was not a choice. I knew god made me how he wanted me, and in his image. So put two and two together, and being gay is not a sin. This got me questioning everything. After that, i met a gay person on World of Warcraft and found Empty Closets. With help from those two sources, i came out to my BFF and sister, with SUPER positives reactions (they are the only two non-conservatives i know). With support from them, i came out to my close friends. However, one friend backstabbed me and told everyone else. That spread to my old Christian highschool, and then i pretty much had to assume everyone knew.

However, i still had not told my mother and father. When i did get the courage to write them a note and leave it for them, it didnt go well. They turned on me. My mother refused to believe i was 100% gay or that i could not change. She told me to stay in the closet (everyone else knew by this point, so that was not an option) and to not label myself as gay. She was horrible to say the least. Things were such a mess. My father was never the "talking" type, so things with him went on as normal as we didnt talk before and dont talk now. Ive forced my mom to watch some gay-friendly movies and read some stuff on the subject, and she is slightly better. At the moment, she just avoids the subject but has stopped trying to force me into a straight life.

So now im out to everyone. Its really hard not for me to believe i was ever in the closet now that im out. Im such a bubbly and flamboyant person that it just shows like a bullseye on my face. Not a bad thing though, since im strong enough to take the heat. Were i live, its common for me to get "Faggot" almost anywhere there is a crowd of people. Never 1 on 1, only when they can hide.

 

Greg's story somewhat parallels mine, what with the evangelical Christianity, the suicide attempts, et cetera.

This Thread is the journal I wrote here as I was coming out. I've gained a lot of insight into the Universe over the past two-plus years, but the thread's still valid. My parents also asked me numerous times about my sexuality, and I always denied being gay. Sure, your dad "knows," but until you say it, it's not official.

Take the plunge and make it official.

 

just do it already!!! lol obviously your parents would b ok with it.

and as for my coming out experience, my mom was the one that pretty much cornered me in my room, so to speak, and asked me. when i didnt answer, she got the picture and not 2 seconds later my dad and sis walked in and found out what they already knew. it went ok, but i could have done without my mom going into my sisters room and crying saying "its so sinful..." or some shit like that. o well, they dont say shit like that anymore so w/e.

 

Grab the bull by the horns. He knows, so telling him should be a piece of cake. Do it!

 

It sounds like your dad would be cool with it. Especially since he's asked you about it before. If you feel ready, I'd admit it to him Don't do like I did, I was so afraid of what my parents would think if I told them I was gay, that I ended up dating a few girls, and then getting married (gasp...to a woman :eek:...ok. it wasn't all that bad at the time) But if I had it to do all over, I would have never went that far. I got divorced a couple of years later, and my ex and I departed as good friends. You have to live your life the way you want to... and not how you think you should to please anyone else (including parents).

 

Your story made me smile. I don't think you really have much to lose by coming out to your dad. He seems like he already knows and that he'll accept you no matter what.
Good luck with it though. You'll be fine.

 

It sounds like your family would be accepting. That's a good thing! Since your father essentially already knows, you might be able to have a bit of "fun" with it. Maybe watch another gay themed movie and bring it up?

I wouldn't come out as bi because you'd still be lying, and coming out gay now prevents you from having to come out again.

I know how anxious it can be coming out to your parents. I figured mine would be OK with it, but I was still terrified to tell them. Though it was worth it, even though nothing really changed.