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Oh My!

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Dare2bProud, May 29, 2009.

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  1. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    So I am a stage manager for this theatre company, we had auditions a week ago and I somehow developed a crush on this guy we had cast. He was amazing at auditions and whenever I was out in the lobby he kept smiling at me. One could probably read into that too much ... and well ... I probably do and did. Anyhow we became Facebook friends, tomorrow some friends and I are going to clubbing. In a knee jerk response I messaged to see if he wanted to go out with us if he had nothing to do tomorrow. Is this too fast?? Do you think things might be awkward now? Or is there nothing wrong in asking someone you've only known for a couple weeks to come out and join you?! I'm nervous now that I sent that message .... I guess I took a risk huh?
     
    #1 Dare2bProud, May 29, 2009
  2. acorn7

    acorn7
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    Meh, why not? The worst that can happen is he declines. It's fine IMO :wink:
     
    #2 acorn7, May 29, 2009
  3. Legnaj

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    its not like your asking for a commitment. it never hurst to ask.
     
    #3 Legnaj, May 29, 2009
  4. twixy30

    twixy30
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    what the worse he could say NO! go for it
     
    #4 twixy30, May 29, 2009
  5. Mickey

    Mickey
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    You did okay. Don't worry.I'm sure it'll go fine. If he goes,just be yourself and have a great time!
     
    #5 Mickey, May 29, 2009
  6. Greggers

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    Id go for it. For sure.
     
    #6 Greggers, May 29, 2009
  7. Chip

    Chip
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    So ya gotta tell us how he responds...
     
    #7 Chip, May 30, 2009
  8. revolutionrock

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    Nah, that's way good! You have nothing to lose. :slight_smile:

    Good luck!
     
    #8 revolutionrock, May 30, 2009
  9. Lumi Nie

    Lumi Nie
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    I don't think you rushed anything. After all, it is not bad to ask someone to join you at a party. :slight_smile: Hope you will have a good time! ^_^
     
    #9 Lumi Nie, May 30, 2009
  10. Jesse Jinx

    Jesse Jinx
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    No worries at all! Like everyone said, worst case, he says no. And there's nothing wrong with asking someone to join you and some friends out for a night of fun. It's not like you're asking him for a candle-lit dinner for two. Plus it'll give you more of a chance to get to know him.

    Keep us posted please! I wanna know how this turns out! :grin:
     
    #10 Jesse Jinx, May 30, 2009
  11. Filip

    Filip
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    As others have said: there's really no risk involved at all. Either he says yes, and then you can go clubbing, or he says no, and that could still be because he has other commitments (or just doesn't like clubbing).

    And asking people out after knowing them for a few weeks isn't that odd at all. It shows you just like them. And there's nothing wrong with that.
     
    #11 Filip, May 30, 2009
  12. Lexington

    Lexington
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    My only concern is the fact that he's in the cast, and you're a stage manager. Are you on equal footing there? If he decides to hook up with someone else in the cast instead of you, can you keep your ego in check to still do the job well? If yes and yes, then no problem. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
    #12 Lexington, May 30, 2009
  13. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    Yeah. I sometimes forget my position as stage manager, I don't do this all the time for everyone. I think asking him out to join me and some friends, isn't a bad deal. If he wants to go further, I will ask him that we keep things under wraps until the show is over and after the show we can pursue the relationship further. Its just a risk and chance I take.
     
    #13 Dare2bProud, May 30, 2009
  14. Lexington

    Lexington
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    If by "under wraps" you mean "let's not pursue this any further until the show ends", then yeah - do it. If by "under wraps" you mean "let's pursue this, but not tell anybody, and they won't know..." Well, you've presumably been in theater long enough to know the likelihood of that one. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
    #14 Lexington, May 30, 2009
  15. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    lol, yeah, you hit it on the nose Lex. There's no way in theatre you can possibly pursue something and keep it a secret. I don't know, I like just going with the flow. Its a community theatre, things like this happen. Its how it works. We'll see. I still haven't received a response from him anyway and I'm 100% sure it will be "no". *shrugs*
     
    #15 Dare2bProud, May 30, 2009
  16. Lexington

    Lexington
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    >>>Its a community theatre, things like this happen. Its how it works.

    And you know how annoying it is when you've got two people who slept together briefly but no longer do working on the same production. Just keep that mental image in mind... :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
    #16 Lexington, May 30, 2009
  17. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    Yes. I do. Right now, I'm just trying to be friends and build a good friendship. Although, its very tempting right now to jump into things. Typically, guys like him don't go for guys like me, so I shouldn't stress too much.
     
    #17 Dare2bProud, May 30, 2009
  18. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    ... and he hasn't responded yet ... so I'm getting very nervous and anxious. Argh!
     
    #18 Dare2bProud, May 30, 2009
  19. Lexington

    Lexington
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    Don't. You invited him out. If he accepts, go have fun with him. If he turns you down, or doesn't respond, go have fun without him. Leave the drama on the stage. :slight_smile:

    Lex
     
    #19 Lexington, May 30, 2009
  20. Dare2bProud

    Dare2bProud
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    I sent him a facebook message, if I don't hear from him by a certain time tonight, should I TXT him ... or does that seem desperate? and just leave it alone and wait until another time?
     
    #20 Dare2bProud, May 30, 2009
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