Kinda long, and sorta complicated.. So I really, really like my best friend. For spimplicity's sake we'll call her Nancy. But she's been having issues with one of her friends (whom we'll name Martha) that she's super close with. Martha is really protective of Nancy and is in love with her. But Nancy doesn't share the feelings. And what I don't know is if Nancy even likes girls. Because when she was telling me about her problems with Martha, she never came out and said that she didn't like girls. (Nancy is/was infatuated with some older boys in our orchestra. So I know she likes boys...) She just said that Martha wasn't a lesbian and in love with only her. I've been trying to be friends with Martha for a long time, before I even knew about her feelings for Nancy. But I feel like she doesn't like me very much. And I'm afraid she'll dislike me even more if she found out that I like Nancy. Also, I'm not sure how Nancy would react to knowing that another girl likes her... So what I'm wondering is: should I tell Nancy I like her? Do you think she even likes girls like that?
Welcome to EC! And that's the shortest "kinda long" post I've ever seen. You don't make it clear how old you are, but I guess it doesn't truly matter. I'll ask the obvious question first - if you're out to your "close friends", why aren't you out to your best friend? That'd definitely be the first move. You don't have to say you like HER right away, but I think an obvious first step would be to say you like girls in general. Lex
I don't understand...did you say your friend was in a relationship with your best friend but she's not heteroflexible? :eek:
Welcome to E.C! i think you can only really bite the bullet and tell her that you like her and hope for the best. As for "Martha", it may be that she already has a vibe that you're interested in "Nancy" and that could be why she gives you the cold shoulder if she has feeling for her as well . Hope it turns out well and good luck.
Well to be safe I'd just go with the facts. While she never said she's NOT into girls she also didn't say she WAS. I think it's your feelings for her that make you WANT to know if she likes girls too so you feel more comfortable with liking her. Just try and put your feelings aside for the moment. Don't approach her with "I like you too" being that she just confided with you about her not feeling the same about Martha. Its not good timing. If you feel you can't put your feelings aside then try and be there for her as a friend, try and bring up your sexuality and see if she says anything, maybe she's having trouble with it herself and you can help. MAYBE then after some time you can hit her with the news.
