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NEVER fall in love

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Tiny Catastrophe, Jun 22, 2009.

  1. Tiny Catastrophe

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    love hurts especially when the person you're in love with doesn't even know if they like you, let alone love you back. She's now avoiding me. When I call her she talks to me for like 5 mins and makes up some excuse why she can't talk. She makes plans with me and then blows them off. Why does love hurt so much? i thought it's supposed to be a good feeling?:bang:
     
  2. silas99

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    Hey Babii
    I know exactly how you feel because the same thing has happened to me. Its a bummer falling for someone who doesnt reciprocate the feelings. The problem lies here....you cant spend your days trying to convince yourself that anything will happen between the two of you. Being in the same position as you I dont think I can give you any decent advice, but I will give you a hug(*hug*) and say that you arent alone in this.xxx
     
  3. ANightDude

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    Love is like a roller coaster - it definitly has its ups and downs.
    Do go as far as saying she is avoiding you unless you are absolutley sure. If so, maybe you should straight up ask her, but if it gets to out of hand, you might want to move on. Maybe she is unsure of her sexuality or just doesn't know how to deal. You might just want to give her time.

    I wish you luck, babe. :slight_smile:
     
  4. Lexington

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    Love hurts when it doesn't fit. Just like a pair of shoes six sizes to small that you've crammed your foot into. But when the size is right, it feels great.

    Your crush seems to have given you all the info you need. Stop trying so hard. Start looking elsewhere. It'll be hard, but it'll be worth it.

    Lex
     
  5. dude99

    dude99 Guest

    Well we all have been there and done that, had our hearts broken. I second on what lex has said. In addition even though its very hard now try to focus on other things in your like such as other interests and hobbies. Have a cry if you feel like it but if you were much closer I would give you a hug.
     
  6. Mickey

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    When loving somebody hurts,it's not a good thing. While this may not be going the way you'd like it to,the right one is out there,looking for you,too. Don't give this situation anymore time. And...don't give up on love. When it's with the right person,love is wonderful.
     
  7. Tiny Catastrophe

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    ive been trying to talk to her about it but for some reason i cant jus come out and tell her i love her. im scared. ive been beating around the bush with her i guess. my 2 biggest fears r rejection and letting ppl see me vulnerable
     
  8. Kaim

    Kaim Guest

    I've been in a situation similar to that before. I really had a hard time coming out to people, and I was going through a similar thing with love, when I realized I love my straight friend. At that time I haven't completely accepted my sexuality, and by how you said it would make you vulnerable, it sounds a bit like you're having trouble with that too.

    Really, the solution would be to start loving yourself. Think about what you're good at, your positive qualities, and be proud of your sexuality. Once I got through that, I had to go make the jump by coming out to the first person. It took two people before I came out to the friend I love, and we're still good friends, see each other every week. Once you get past the hurdle of coming out to the first person, it becomes easier each step, and you don't feel bad about it. After my first love another guy crush came along, and I never told him how I feel, but now the first thing I do if I see him is tell him my feelings and just let it out of my system. I'm sure if you told this girl your feelings you'd feel good too.

    As far as rejection, you just have to learn to take 'no' for an answer sometimes. It's hard and I have trouble accepting that as an answer quite a lot, though it's a part of life. I guess though it was easier for me since I knew my first love was straight all along, but nevertheless, it felt good admitting my feelings for him and getting it out of my system.

    Sorry for the long wall of text but you sounded hurt. I hope this helps you. (*hug*)
     
  9. Meropspusillus

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    Something you have to be careful of is mistaking crushes for love. I'm not saying you're not in love with this person, but think carefully before you name something Love and then condemn love because it didn't work out.
     
  10. Legnaj

    Legnaj Guest

    Butters said it best:

    "Yeah... And I'm sad! But at the same time I'm really happy that something can make me feel that sad... It's like... It makes me feel alive, y'know? It makes me feel human. The only way I could feel this sad now, is if I felt somethin' really good before, so I have to take the bad with the good. So I guess what I'm feelin' is, like a beautiful sadness... I guess that sounds stupid... Besides, I'd rather be a crying little pussy than a faggy goth kid"

    Love is an emotion, and like all emotions the warning lables are something we learn through experience.
     
  11. shireguy

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    i know how you feel, the exact same thing happened to me
     
  12. Eleanor Rigby

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    Maybe you can just give her some space and some time. You're not her, you don't know how she feels. Maybe she feels you put too much pressure on her or something like that.
    Give it time and things will settle down. Maybe they are going to evolve the way you wish, maybe not, but calling her every 5 min definitly won't help. You can't force her to love you, and if she doesn't know what her feelings toward you are, it won't help her to figure this out if you don't leave her some space.
    Step back, try to see other people and when you are seeing her, lets talk about random stuff and try to keep things light and funny. She'll figure out what she feels for you and even if it's not what you are waiting for, putting some space between you to might help you not to end with a heartbreak.
    Take care, Eleanor