so i found out that one of the people in my school who is gay did some things with one of my friend, like they held hands, sent naughty picture to each other and some other things i came out to my friend and he was cool with it but idk i really want to crack him open because i seriously think he is bi, he smiled when he found yaoi on my psp and kept watching it, because a normal guy will stop the video and never look at it agian, but he did look at it again a while later. is there a thing i could do to make him open up a little & not try to scare him off? idk how to reword this, but see if he is bi, because i'm still kinda confused with him.
First and foremost, asking any sort of direct probing questions = bad idea. Spend time with him and (even though he knows you're gay), bring up gay topics every now and then, and mix in a sprinkling of care "You can tell me anything". You didn't mention how recently you came out to him, but he might need a bit of time to process it before opening up to you. Also consider that he may be confused himself, or simply not gay or bi.
Hm. Seeing as you came out to him, and he didn't say, "oh hey, me too!", he's probably not ready to tell people. This is assuming he is either gay or bisexual, and based on what you've said, there's a good chance, but I wouldn't act on that assumption unless you get some sort of confirmation. I wouldn't try to push him into admitting anything. If he is gay/bi/questioning, he may still be in kind of a weird place, trying to figure himself out, come to terms with it, or whatever. You've come out to him, so he at least knows he'll have a sympathetic ear if he wants to talk to someone about it. You could bring up stuff that's in the news, like same-sex marriage or Don't Ask, Don't Tell, and it may make him feel more comfortable talking about it with you. But flat-out asking someone if they're gay or bi may make them defensive or upset them if they're not really secure about themselves, so it's something I'd avoid doing. In the meanwhile, just realize that if he is gay or bisexual, and doesn't feel ready to tell you, you should respect that. If he knows he can open up to you without being judged, he will, in his own time. It's what friends do. =)
And I'd add, if he's comfortable talking about those topics, don't be afraid to throw in a well timed, not-awkward "$actorname is Sooo hot" or "I say the cutest guy at the mall yesterday".
I know it can be hard to sit by and wait for him to come out to u, providing that he is gay. U probably like him and the possiblilities are endless but muh like urself he has to come to this in his own time. Like those before me have said try to create a save environment for him, be his friend and make sure he know u can keep his secrets. It doesn't hurt to give a little push but not too much.
I have a friend similar to that. I think she's gay, or at least bi, but she won't tell anyone and still pretends to like guys, even though there's no real feeling in it. I'm just waiting for her to do it on her own time
Like others have said, the best thing to do is wait and offer your compassion. My best friend came out to me after I'd been out to him for 4 months after just a lot of patience and care.
I almost have a friend like that, except I've never met him personally. He's so attractive in public though, that I wish I could meet him and then find out if he's gay. On the bright side, your friend sounds like he's pretty accepting regardless of whatever his orientation is.
