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Joining the Army

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jack2009, Jul 23, 2009.

  1. Jack2009

    Jack2009 Guest

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    Anyone here joined the army, and how was your experience?

    I'm thinking of joining and I want to do it. USA
     
  2. L|L

    L|L
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    What are your motivations? What do you want to get out of a military career? What are your goals regarding this life change?
     
  3. The Enigma

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    Yes? What is your intention and reason? By joining, you're agreeing to never reveal your personal sexual orientation. Just know that before joining and never bitch about the massive amounts of homoerotic comments and slurs thrown around. It is common place.
     
  4. Jack2009

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    I want to do it because I want the experience, benefits, to make me feel like I accomplish something big in life.

    And for character reasons. And I want to be more of a real "man" to my family after I tell them I am gay.

    But the military always interested me though, so that's not the main reason. I want the skills, and I want to make my image better. Death doesn't scare me either.
     
    #4 Jack2009, Jul 23, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2009
  5. Chip

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    If you insist on joining the military, I'd be inclined to choose the navy, there are a MILLION gay people in it, including some who are somewhat out, and I think there's a higher tolerance than in the Army.

    However, that said, I know about 10 people who have gone in within the past 3-4 years. Two of them love it. Three of them got kicked out for being gay. Two others got out because they were absolutely miserable and knew people who could pull strings. The others are miserable and still stuck in till their enlistment is up.

    The following applies to people who enlist, not those who go in through ROTC or other
    advanced programs: If you are a follower, are not so much of an independent thinker, are one who does not have a strong thirst for knowledge or one who isnt' good at seeking out people around you who are highly intelligent and motivated, then the armed forces is probably a good choice for you. They say the Army is a great mother :slight_smile:

    If you're highly motivated, enjoy learning and reading and being around people who are really sharp and will pull you up to their level, then you'll probably do much better going to college, doing something entrepreneurial, or that sort of thing.

    This, of course, is an over generalization, but on the whole I think it's not terribly far off.

    Also, recruiters are masterfully manipulative at making you think they are your friend, that they are looking out for you, that everything will be just wonderful and peachy. Unfortunately, it is well documented that they pretty much lie their asses off, and will promise absolutely *anything* to get you to sign up. But if you actually read the document you're signing (no one does) it says that nothing the recruiter promises is binding, and, in fact, nothing they put in writing on the document itself (what training you'll get, where you'll be assigned, what you'll do, etc) is binding either, and that the armed forces can change the rules at any time, including extending your term of service as long as they want, with absolutely no input, recourse, or anything else from you.

    If you're comfortable entering into a completely one-sided and unconscionable (but legally enforceable) agreement, and it's what you really want... then go for it, but do so with your eyes completely open :slight_smile:
     
  6. Chip

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    One other thought:

    If you really want to make something of your life and do so through the military, consider going to college and joining ROTC. I believe that there are even ROTC scholarships to be had. You'll get a college education, plus great military training, and you'll enter the military system as part of the officer's elite... better pay, better services, more advancement.

    But also... don't get the idea that the armed forces are the only, or even the best, way to make a difference in the world, or to do something big. If you are motivated, and can find passion for a particular cause (let's say, for example, helping low-income students get a good education, or rebuilding war-torn parts of the world) there are a milliion ways you can make a really important, meaningful difference in the world that don't involve committing yourself to the military.

    I'm just big on options and choices, and the military tends to limit those :slight_smile:
     
  7. Jack2009

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    Did they say why they found it horrible afterward?

    The military wouldn't be my main way of helping the world, it's just for me as a person type deal.
     
  8. Shevanel

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    I think it'd be silly to join a certain section of the military just because of the supposed abundance of LGBT people. But that's just me.
     
  9. Jack2009

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    me too.

    But if they are serving the country in any way, then whatever makes them most comfortable. At least they are serving I guess.
     
  10. L|L

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    As far as character-building goes, the military is great. It give one a sense of belonging. You'll make life-long friends and have experiences of which one only dreams.

    I was in the Navy and resigned my commission because of speculation about my sexuality - mainly I pissed the wrong person off. But I enjoyed the time I spent.

    As for enlistment, keep the following in mind no matter what branch you select (and when I'm home, I may go into detail about what to expect from different branches):

    Your enlistment commitment will be a minimum of 6 years, most likely 8. This doesn't mean that you'll be on active duty for the whole time, though, depending on the branch, it's a possibility. You might be on active duty for 4 years, then reserves to finish-out your obligation. You can be call-up for active duty at any time you're in the reserves. You may want to go into one field, but they military ultimately makes the decision, mostly the recruiter. He has billets to fill. This month may be air crew survival, so everyone gets dumped into there.

    I can't emphasise this enough: GET IT IN WRITING. Whatever the promise, be it a duty station, billet, or term of service, if it isn't on your enlistment contract, it doesn't happen. Also, it doesn't matter what's in your DEP contract, for one you go through bootcamp, there will be another enlistment contract for active duty. Make sure all that was promised on your DEP contract, ends-up on your AD contract.

    Recruiters may not, by order, lie. They may, however, omit certain parts, or embellish on others.
     
  11. Revan

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    This is just my own opinion so please don't hate me for it.

    Personally I just don't see what the allure is of the army. If it's to help your family, they don't make a lot of money; if you are wanting to become more of a man then do something that doesn't put your life at risk. I'd rather be a doctor or hell someone doing porn that be in the army and get killed, no thank you.

    But do whatever you feel is right, I just better not read something in the paper about you getting sent home in a coffin.
     
  12. The Enigma

    The Enigma Guest

    What experience are you looking for exactly? Do you have any idea how difficult and extremely fatiguing being a serviceman can be both emotionally and physicall?

    And what benefits are you looking for? Dental? Health? Life? You're sure going to probably need them after you enlist, especially if you get shipped on a tour.

    To feel accomplished? You can accomplish sooooo much more without joining the service if you know where to look and have patience. I think you're setting yourself up for failure because you're believing it's going to make yourself accomplished and great, like it's a truly great career, easy, and seem a bit too care free in your selection of it. Sure you can feel great afterwards, but chances are, you'll feel really dissappointed in a waste of time you put in, especially if ur booted out which your chances are very high.

    And just joining the service, regardless of where, to show that you're a 'man' to your family is not a very good reason to join. You shouldn't live your life to prove you're a man to them just because you're gay. It's not going to make you into a 'man', you're going to be who you are regardless. Living a lie does not truly make you a different person.

    What skills do you want? What image? Your body image? To impress others? Death will scare you when you hit the battlefield, guaranteed.

    I think your reasoning is a tad shallow. If you're looking to 'man' up or improve your own 'image', there are safer, better, healthier ways. You're looking at a 4-9 year committment of your life as well. A life, you'll spend the better half of lying about. The army in particular is very homophobic. It's not all fun and games. You should REALLY know what you're getting yourself into and what you're actually doing if you enlist. Truly, I think you need to educate yourself just a tad more on the above subjects before you make your decision.
     
  13. Trace

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    Well, best of luck in all of your ventures.
     
  14. djt820

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    I think its absolutely absurd, arrongant, and pretentious to join the military to prove youre a "real man". But thats just me.
     
  15. Jack2009

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    And that is exactly why I ask. :wink:

    I think I lost the hype for it already though. After I found out that it could last to 8 years.
     
    #15 Jack2009, Jul 23, 2009
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2009