ahhhh I have never had such a crush on someone before. When he texts me I get butterflies and I ponder over what to respond to be witty or funny for like 10 minutes. I think about him all day. I talk about him to my family constantly, just in the friend context, but I bring him up waaay more than any other friend. We literally have like everything in common.. like today I said something about not liking a movie, and he said "well that would be the first thing we don't have in common". We discussed gay issues and he said he doesn't have a problem with gays and supports gay marriage...We hang out almost every day, usually in a group setting though. The summer is almost over but we are both moving to the same city in a couple months. I hope I'm not being pathetic or obsessive. I'm not out yet so I find it terribly frustrating to know I'll never find a boyfriend until I can be open. My gaydar has gone off with him a few times. Such as him not having a girlfriend since middle school (we are 18), never having had sex.. but on the other hand he works for construction and wears flannel (lol)... very hard to read... :help: i've really never been so attracted to someone. And i know its special this time because its really mostly personality over physical attraction. what should I do in this situation? .. he's filled my mind for two months now. Should I just try to push the idea away... or continue to be friends through college and see what happens when I have to come out... If he knows I'm gay it could ruin our closeness maybe?... ...ahhh the straight kids don't hafta put up with this crap!!!! thanks... Mike
Tell him you're gay and see what happens. He'll either say " noooooo you're f'en sicko!!! get the f out of my life you freak!!!".... "I accept gays but I am not gay".... "I am gay and I love you!!!" it's no better to be safe than sorry (in this situation) * first one; if he cannot accept you then he's no friend *second one; a friend but at least he accepts you * yay
OK, I know that EC is the wrong place to ask this, but really, how many times do two straight kids discuss gay issues and profess support for gay marriage. Since you've had the conversation, I'd say he suspects you're gay already, or he's gay...or both :eusa_danc. So just come out to him - if he's that close to you and based on his earlier comments, you'll get a good reaction. And it'll help in your future coming outs. And of course, this is the first step, so leave the 'crushing on him' for another time.
I so feel for you. I had a best mate that I lived with for a couple of years that I crushed on. I read all the wrong things. We were great mates, but I read all the little nuances that get your hopes up the wrong way. We were just good buddies, and I read way too much into tiny little things that he did. It killed me when he went out with one of the few girls that I also found great attraction to. All I can say is to be carefull in how you process interactions. I so wish we could have little stamps that define sexuality at birth, life and relationships would be so much easier.
NO, gay people would be put as slaves, and parents would scream "NOOOO!!!!". The authorities would put the kids into some camp, and it would be a nightmare that will never end. Let me see your wrist, "A fag aight, and your number is 1844"
I'm in the same boat as you, and it sucks. My crush has been my best friend since forever and he's never had a girlfriend (unless he's never told me ), hell we've never even had a conversation about girls before. He's a close friend (very, very close) so I get a lot of mixed signals every time we're together. So what can you do? Well, I'd just keep on being "just friends" because that's what I'm doing now. It's tough because you never really know how the other person will react when the time comes. You speculate and speculate but in the end, you're just hoping and praying that everything will turn out alright. The only thing you can really do is come out when you're ready and see how he takes it. Just like how it'll be for your friends and your family. Maybe it'll be good, maybe it'll be okay, maybe it'll be hell. All you can do is see what happens when you get there. Best case senario, you don't have to come out to him. You guys end up really close, fall in love, and end up sharing one of those romantic Hollywood moments, or he comes out to you. Worse case senario, you come out to him and he totally avoids you from then on. You lose everything you had between you two. For me, I hope for the first one
come out to him i'd put money on him being gay or at least bi and if not he will def be accepting a good friend. Really you have nothing to lose by telling him
I was in a similar situation in 11th grade with this guy named Mychal. I was so in love with him. I couldn't wait to go to school. I dreaded weekends and holidays. I was borderline obsessed. He was my best friend also, which was weird because until 11th grade we hated each other. He used to walk me to class, and call when there was a problem. My point is that I didn't tell him I was really liking him a lot. When I was pretty positive that he wouldn't cast me away. I eventually told him and he was like he already knew. But it was like a year or two after graduation, so it wasn't the same feelings involved. I would tell him now before it gets to late. You probably already have some idea of how he will react. Don't procrastinate.
There's a possiblity it could work. Don't let it pass or you'll wonder about it and regret for a long time to come.
Actually Shorty,,, i happen to know about certain little "stamps" (yea lets call em that) that define sexuality at birth... all i need to know is his date of birth, time and location and i'll see if i can define his sexuality i'm serious....
Ah, love's bitter-sweet sting. You seem to be in a good situation. He says he supports gays, so at the worst you'll have a friend who understands and supports you. At the best you'll have boyfriend. I say tell him you're gay first and let that process for a few days, see how he reacts, and how he acts with you. Then, if al goes well, tell him you like him.
