Being gay changes the way I feel about myself

I think it's fine to experiment with how you present yourself . Even though you know sexuality shouldn't determine how you dress/look you feel like it should? Maybe this is just a part of the coming out process?

 

Have you considered that maybe it was your time in the closet when you were actually pretending and that now that you're coming out, you're finding the real you? Maybe it's not that your sexuality is influencing your style. Maybe it was just that your style was stuck in the closet.

*rimshot*

Yes folks, that's my bad pun for the day! (!)

 

for me it has been both but now im leaning towards dresses. i think i for me it cuz i like women who dress in pants its hot to me and i just feel for me that i am feeling more girly these days but i think its just part of coming out for you. i think deep down you may have always wanted to dress one way and now that your out you are finding it a change for you anyway i hope this makes since to you

 

^love it.

 

Here's how I'd figure it out.
If it's an "I want to wear this" situation, then wear it!
If it's an "I think I'm supposed to wear this" situation, then remind yourself that you are allowed to do what you want.

Personally, I have more trouble with my friends stereotyping me than with me stereotyping myself. Even friends who seem to understand me and my feelings really well. Yesterday, one of my closest (male) friends said, "Dude, are you wearing pants made for guys??" And I said, "Uh... yes? Why?" And he just started laughing and said, "Oh my god you are such a lesbian!!" I think I said something like, "Yeah, I was already aware that I liked girls, thank you." (lol, I never have good comebacks.)

 

this could just be part of the coming out process for you. I know a couple people that upon coming out turned into like queenly, prancing, screaming little girls on the male side. Nothing against anyone like that i am just saying they came out began acting like that for like 6 months then went back towards their more pre-coming out selves

 

Just like there is pressure in the straight community to dress as our gender would, there is a similar pressure in the gay community to dress like your sexual orientation dictates. When I came out to friends, I found myself saying things I thought gay people would say, and letting my friends make me try on skinny jeans. But those things weren't me. Yes, skinny jeans are somewhat "gay" and I'm gay, but that doesn't mean that I'm someone who would wear skinny jeans.

It's hard to maintain a sense of identity when we shift from defining ourselves as "straight/closeted" to "LGBT". I think it's most important to know your true self so that images of "what you're supposed to be" don't dictate who you are.

 

i get where you are coming from with this sort of. And i think markio is right. One of the things my brothers GF told me when she found out was "you should dress more gay. I mean you don't look gay and if you dressed gay you would be more approachable by guys." i replied with "na i like the way i dress and don't wanna change that" take that approach, part of being open about my sexuality for me is freedom. I have some tight pants that i used to never wear now i like wearing them because i don't care anymore if people look at me and think that i'm gay. Just as i don't care if i do not look gay or bi or whatever. at least i try to be like that.