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My friend has feelings for me

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by CrystalCat, Aug 1, 2009.

  1. CrystalCat

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    So yesterday i went to my friends house. it started to rain so we made an awesome blanket tent in her living room while watching do the right thing. so we were chilling there giggling and what not and playing. she'd wrestle me to the floor and lay down on me. It got later and we were there, listening to some old jazz records, and we got really close, so im not sure how it happened, but we were in the tent hugging/cuddling and she told me she had feelings for me. So i was like awww, thats cute i like you also. which i do, ive liked her for a while, but it was coming close to midnight and i had to get home so her mom drove me home and whatnot and we talked on aim about music until i went to bed. But now we're avoiding the subject and not acknowledging what she said. im not sure if i should bring it up, or just act like it never happened. =/
     
  2. jsandoval1192

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    I think that just maybe she is feeling awkward about telling you, but I'm sure she's coming to terms with what she said.
    I say you just give it some time for it to really settle down and then I'm sure it will come up in a future conversation.
     
  3. biisme

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    I think you should definitely try and make sure that you don't mind. It may be, like jsandoval1192 said, that she is feeling awkward now. If she knows that everything is alright between you guys maybe she will bring it up again. If she doesn't you can always ask, "do you want to talk about what happened?". If she says yes, then you can, and if she says no the you should leave it for a while. However, giving her a choice might make her more comfortable.
     
  4. shimmersky

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    This exact thing happened to me.
    In my situation, I didn't bring it up, but I kept talking to her / hanging out with her to make sure she knew things weren't weird between us. And in about a week, we were talking online and she finally told me that she didn't know what to do, because she really did like me, but she was Catholic and identified as straight.
    So, that approach might work for you.
    Keep us updated; I'm curious to know what she says about it, or if she ever brings it up at all.
     
  5. Lexington

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    I can't give advice until I find out one vital piece of information.

    ...how do you feel about her?

    Lex
     
  6. Pealusti

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    This happened to me a couple of weeks ago.
    My best friend from work and I were innocently flirting, I didn't think much of it because I flirt a lot but I thought about it more and I started to like her. But I told myself I shouldn't because I have a girlfriend and she has a boyfriend. I told her a few days later just to get it off my chest and she told me she had a crush on me for a long time but she didn't know what was going on cos she had never had feelings for a girl before. I didn't know what to do because of her being 21 and me being almost 18 and we both had partners. But we talked about it. And figured out what we should do. We both agreed not to do anything about it. Now, we are closer then ever.
    I think you should talk to your friend. Maybe she is a bit scared to because this is the first time she's had feelings for another girl. Maybe she needs a friend to help her figure this situation out. But don't force her into any conversation she doesn't want to talk about.
    I hope this helped. :icon_bigg
     
  7. CrystalCat

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    I do have feelings for her, i've had them for a while, but put it to the back of my mind because i never thought they would be reciprocated.
     
  8. CrystalCat

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    Update : We still talk, still haven't brought up the night. I was supposed to go to a concert with her today, but by the time i got ready it was pouring buckets, and that messes up the bus and subway lines but she already got there. She was a bit sad that i didnt get to come, because she said she wanted to see me. =/
     
  9. malachite

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    Maybe she likes you, but isn't out, or not comfortable being gay yet.
     
  10. Black Cat

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    If you feel the same way then by all means tell her this. Let her know that you have had the same type of feelings, and would like to discuss said feelings with her. Judging on the update you posted, and her statement about wanting to see you, I would say she still harbors those feelings and would be open to possibly talking them over with you.