confusion

=O i think that u feel like bcoz u want b normal?? da only way ul do it wiv da same sex is if ur the opposite??

 

I don't really know what to make of your fantasies. All I can tell you is this: the best way to figure out what you are is to notice what gender turns you on. Sometimes the need to be normal blinds us from what we really are. That's what happened to me. I know this will be a blunt question, and you don't have to answer it, but you can use the answer to figure out what you are: when you masturbate, if you do, do you think about males, females, or both?

 

I think you might be bisexual, and transgender[which means you have the body of one gender but the mind of another].
I have a close friend who's transgender and he told me that he didn't feel lesbian, he felt like a man who wanted to be with a woman. What it might be with you, rather than wanting to fit in, or shame, is a heterosexual nature with confusion of which gender is dominant. The gender that you identify with most is the one you should stick with, but it will take a lot of thought.
I realize that it's a lot to take in, and that it's very confusing, so feel free to PM me if you have any questions. (*hug*)

 

Why do you have to give yourself a label? It doesn't say how old you are but as you go through life, there will be people whom you will definitely know you are attracted to. That might give you more of an idea where you stand. My best advice is just to relax and have fun. The time will come when you will know for sure.

 

I agree with beckyg. I know from my own experience that I have spent twenty-three years telling myself lies about my own sexuality because I wanted to fit in with what my parents and society expected of me. We are humans not labels. The best thing to do is give yourself some time and as you interact with others I am sure it will become much clearer than it is now. In summary, be yourself. I hope this helps.
careandrespect

 

I agree with above. relax, easy to say but perhaps take the focus of sex a bit, you say you have some introversions and insecurities, well read some of the forums here. get familiar with others, you will find similar and you will start to communicate. what you will find in some cases is that others have insecurities and also problems too. it is quite something to not feel so alone.
Sometimes fantasies just exist as such and wont get to be played out. A relationship is between 2 people, choosing which person may have more to do with compatability than fantasy or sexual orientation.
see what others have to say, and know you are not alone.

 

Hey mate and welcome to EC, glad you're here.

With labels, they're like a double edged sword, they can be good and they can be bad. I like them and dislike them at the same time. They can confuse you and they can also make things clearer. I think I just made myself confused.

For me, I went through many 'label stages' where one day I was gay, the next I was straight the next I was bi. Then for a while I just never thought about the labels and just lived life the way I was. After that time without thinking about I realized what I am, but hell that could change still!

Yeah everyone wants to fit in, I would love to be straight and I like to be viewed as a straight person as well. But I'm proud that I'm not.

With all the gay pride stuff and things like that us homosexuals are starting to be viewed as 'normal' but not everyone will ever view us as normal. Its like dark skinned people, not everyone will always like them.

That's pretty sad to hear about you're childhood. (*hug*) Everyone here is supportive so if you need to talk about it, don't feel scared.

Transgender stuff always confuses me. =P Theres always a possiblity you can be one though.

Hope everything gles well with you upnatum.