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"Thats so gay!" exusce me, but I didn't know gay meant stupid.

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by SilhouetteDream, Aug 9, 2009.

  1. SilhouetteDream

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    Okay I don't know if this topic has come up already, but I searched it and couldn't really find much

    Does it annoy you when people use the word gay as a synonym for stupid?

    "mrs. So-and-so gave us an eight page paper for homework...that's so gay! Ugh."
    "it's gonna rain on Saturday? Ugh that's gay."

    I mean, I know that most people who say it don't mean to offend anybody, but still why not just say stupid? Is one more syllable gonna kill yah?
    Personally, it's not that I get mad at whoever uses the word gay in such a way, it's more upsetting to me that the word gay and stupid are somehow interchangable now.
    Cuz the way I see it, gay does not mean stupid and gay people are certainly not stupid.

    Do you guys feel the same way or am I just overreactive?
     
  2. GhostDog

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    No, it bugs me too. I just point it out any time it comes up. "That's so gay." "You got a problem with that?" Usually gets their attention, anyway. From what I've seen, people usually don't realize what they're saying. It's just another "thing I use to describe crap I don't like" word, they don't usually register that they're saying something offensive. So I just let 'em know they are, and at the very least they know not to say it around me. =P
     
  3. Jack2009

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    I hate it.

    My mother said "I rather watch Hannah than that faggoty gay show!" (referring to my sister watching spongebob).

    I think she was just saying it's stupid.
     
  4. 71390S

    71390S Guest

    "That's so gay" bugs me more than faggot or queer does.

    Something about it I guess.
     
  5. Maddy

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    Firing back with "that's so straight" tends to make the person lost for words, I've noticed.
     
  6. Numfarh

    Numfarh Guest

    Er... Have you ever watched Spongebob? It's SUPER gay. It's ULTRA gay. It is very much a "Faggoty Gay" show.

    That's what makes it sooooo awesome.

    [YOUTUBE]UbiEAyHY5WQ[/YOUTUBE]

    That being said, just keep saying that you think that it's inappropriate to call something 'gay' instead of stupid. Eventually, people will stop saying it just to avoid the confrontation.
     
    #6 Numfarh, Aug 9, 2009
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 9, 2009
  7. string3343

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    I just sort of cringe and take it, but I wish I could speak out and tell them how stupid they are being...
     
  8. 71390S

    71390S Guest


    I think it's hard cause you know your friends don't mean to put down gay people, but they are. So then it's like they are hurt you ever thought they'd put down gays. And that just goes to show how ingrained homophobia is in our culture ><
     
  9. jony8472

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    It doesn't bother me at all... it's just language, and language is constantly changing =P
    One day 'gay' is in, the next it's out.
    I think people who get too hung up on the words OTHER people choose to use really need to find something better to do...
     
  10. 71390S

    71390S Guest

    I think the attitude of "I should be able to say whatever I want and not take responsibility for what I say" is so ridiculous.

    "That's so gay" reflects how homophobic our culture is. If people are OK with homophobic language and have no problem being apathetic towards homophobia, be my guest. But I certainly have no problem with people who assert themselves and say "you know what, I realize you don't hate gays but it bothers me when you say that." People aren't robots, we are humans with feelings, and language is damn powerful tool.
     
  11. jony8472

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    What a bitch!

    Does that reflect how sexist we are?

    You have a dog's life!

    Does that show we treat animal's poorly?

    No, 'gay' has entered language as an idiom, with a separate meaning - language is very powerful, and can be used in a multitude of contexts.
     
  12. SilhouetteDream

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    I mean I don't know, the way I see it, it's singling out a certain group of people, and associating them with the word stupid, wether people are aware of it or not. What's the difference of that and putting down a certain group of people that are a different race, religion, etc?
     
  13. jony8472

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    That's true, hell, it's probably where it all started. But, through the process of subreption, the societal view has moved on from that.

    The same thing probably happened to gay originally, as it went through a period of meaning both happy, and homosexual, so there'll come a point again, where one meaning may drop off; or it could just continue as a polysemous word.
     
  14. 71390S

    71390S Guest


    Absolutely. The USA is patriarchial, and we have a rich history of oppressing women. It is no wonder "bitch" is a sexist negative word we use in our culture and apply to all other genders. Look at how comfortable we are as a culture using this word. It sure doesn't pack much of a punch anymore, but that doesn't mean the history and inclination isn't behind it. Same with "spazz" or "retarded." What is something bitch, retard, and gay all have in common? They are minority groups that have been on the end of hatred and oppression. There is a reason why "straight" "mentally sound" are not associated with stupidity.

    Why do you think the word gay has become synonymous with the word stupid, and other negative connotations? Because we live in such a gay friendly world, right?

    Does our culture treat gay people poorly?
     
  15. Numfarh

    Numfarh Guest

    You may remember a time when "You totally jewed me!" or "That's so jewish!" was popular. Does it make it okay? No. It doesn't. And when people were informed that it was inappropriate, it effectively stopped being used. Same goes for retarded. It is frowned upon now more often than not.

    We are simply trying to do the same with gay. Bring it back from being a synonym for stupid or annoying.
     
  16. jony8472

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    I'd hardly say retarded has stopped being used...

    I won't comment on the other two, because I've never heard of them ><
     
  17. Koll

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    ugh I hate it. and it confuses me too. Because my family uses it a lot, but they selfclaim to not be homophobic "or anything of that nature" which makes it really confusing if I could come out of not. blaaah :dry:
     
  18. jony8472

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    you could ask them why they use it, their responses may help you gauge whether you should come out or not =]
     
  19. Numfarh

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    It hasn't stopped being used, true. But it is certainly more frowned upon than when it was popular. The general consensus is that it's rude and insulting to a select group of people.
    If we can reinforce that using 'gay' in a slanderish way is bad, then eventually, we will stop hearing people say it all together.

    But I suppose if you don't support it, just don't bring us down. Don't use it even if you disagree.
     
  20. jony8472

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    This is quite amusing because I'm reading about semantic shift at this moment.