Hey guys. So, imagine if you will a good night at the bar [regular bar] and hanging around your friends partying and drinking when this HOT guy, that you pointed out previously to your friends, is approaching you. This guy was incredibly hot and giving me "the stare". So hard that my friends knew (my friends are straight). And this is where I epically failed: I turned around and started talking to my two guy friends, completely ignoring him, except for an occasional glance. I swear I was trying to figure out what to say when he left. The heck? I'm terrible at reacting when guys approach me. what the heck do I do when this happens?
If you're out to your friends, I suggest a direct approach like : "Hi, do you like a drink ?" The worst that could happened is that he says no
Well - I don't think you're alone. Most people don't successfully meet people when they're out at a bar, despite what you pick up from TV and movies. But in this situation, you certainly could have said 'Hi'. He would have then either stopped and said 'hi' too, or just kept walking. Just like with any other conversation, you then carry on with 'how are you?' and 'what's your name? I'm jostencase' But don't beat yourself up.
I'd have to agree with the Cecile and Jim, a Hi, fancy a drink? would be fine to open up communications. But yeah, don't worry about it; you didn't talk to him this time around, so when you next do (to him or any other hot guy) grab the ball by the horns and go get him If you need further encouragement, tell your mates that you were hanging out with that you felt silly for passing him up, so next time around when you point Hot Mess out to them, they'll make sure you say Hi
It's just direct eye contact throws me off. I was confuzzled. Like a deer in the headlights. I swear, I did something similar when a hot guy walked to me to hey at Walmart and mumbled and looked the other way. I'm totally not used to guys, especially hot guys checking me out or approaching me. I lost a good amount of weight and look (and feel) a whole lot better now. So this is kinda new. Oh and yeah, I'm out.
Eye contact is soooooooo important when you're being approached or approaching someone else. If they turn away, they're either giving you an indirect signal that they're uncomfortable, shy, or not interested. When you're out and about and someone is staring, the polite thing to do is to look away. However, in a bar situation, the rules are sort of reversed. Giving him full eye contact will show that you have confidence in yourself and that you are interested. If he turns out not to be gay, he probably won't even realize that there was some sort of connection (in the case that he was literally just staring) and he'll probably just walk off. But chances are he wanted you to know he was there. Next time, just keep your eyes up and perhaps offer a friendly smile. As others have said, the worse that can happen is that you totally misjudged the situation and he thinks you're a geek and walks off. :lol:
