I've kinda been feeling bad these past couple of days. It is a bit of a long story so bear with me. Last year was my senior year in high-school (Graduated now). For all my life I've been made fun of for everything, being stupid (I was, got good grades in the end though), fat (Lost the weight eventually), smelly (I've started taking care of myself more), gay (Nothing to fix with this one ^_^), and I just lost it one day and walked right out of school. Since then I had a tudor and I passed my exams. As much as I hated that place with every drop of blood in my veins (and I try not to hate; I dislike. When I use hate, I mean haaaaate), I might say there were a few people here and there that I tolerated. I dare say I might even have considered them to be my friends. Fast forward to today and I haven't seen any of these people in nearly a year, some even longer than that. I'm not a social person at all, I spend all my time in my room goofing off and occasionally working on my novel. I rarely ever even leave the house let alone hang out with anyone. And for the time being, I'm fine with that. I know that as a human being I need interaction to be healthy and I do intend to go out into the world, meet people and maybe (one day) even get a husband. The issue is I find myself missing these few people quite a bit and that's troubling to me because these feelings have just recently overtaken me and out of nowhere it seems. I went so far as to look up this one guy on myspace, even considering sending him a little "hello" message or something but he hasn't been on since 2006 :icon_sad:
Hiyah, to begin with, I'm sorry you feel the way you currently do. (*hug*) It's always hard to loose touch with people, even if you weren't exactly close with them. But that doesn't have to exactly happen. Like you did with that one guy, looking him up on myspace was a good idea. Look up the people you miss, and send them a little hello message! something along the lines of hey, how are you doing, what's been up with you since graduation? Since the person you did look up wasn't currently using myspace, maybe you could look up people on facebook too? It never hurts to look. If you do end up sending messages to them, two things can happen. 1., They message you back and you end up talking. That's great. It may take them a while to reply back, you may not ever meet up with them, but the fact of the matter is taht you went out of your way to say hello to a friend, which I at least, would find flattering. It never hurts to try! 2., The person never replies back to you. And that's okay too. It's their loss. Don't think it's because of you, and they didn't message you back because they didn't like you. Anyone who purposely ignores a message like you would send them is certainly someone whose not even worth the effort. Then there's a whole different approach too- Instead of looking for friendships from the past, you could also make new friends. Do you plan on going to college? That's a great way to meet new people. Or perhaps a job. Not only can you make new friends, but get cash too :icon_wink It seems like you've come a long way since high school; Loosing weight, taking more care of yourself, and that's a great accomplishment- congrats! But now it's time to show it! You can still keep it touch with people from the past, but it's also great to go out there and make new friends. Good luck! :icon_bigg
Hi there! I think it is great that you have started to turn things around and that you are trying to take care of yourself. You have come a long way, which is great! Now that you have made large changes in your life, from the sound of it, it looks like that there is something much larger banging at the door that wants to get out. Missing the few people from school, looking one person up in MySpace, are signs that there is a part of you that wants to get out of the house, talk with people, interact with them and be social. As you have mentioned, we all need social interaction. Maybe what you could do is start by going out a bit. Make your intention of meeting people a reality. Start working on that goal! Maybe try finding a LGBT support/social group or a PFLAG chapter. Support/social groups are a great way of meeting and getting to know new people. Often they have social events or a get together during the week or on weekends. Maybe try contacting a group and join them for a social event. Usually they are very welcoming and it is a safe environment. I suspect that it might be a bit awkward at first and you might be really nervous but as you this more often, it will become second nature to you. Another thing you could do is join a club, or activity in your community. Do you have a hobby? Is there something that you like or would love to explore? Give that some thought, and if you have found something that you would like to explore or try out, try finding a group of people in your community who have similar or the same interests/hobby and ask them if you could join in. That will get you more out of the house, and begin to get to know people. Sure, it might not be the crowed with whom you want to hang out all the time, but it is a start. The same goes for a LGTB support/social group. Maybe try not to worry too much about the past and about the few people that you did talk to in school. As you have seen, it might be actually will hard to get a hold of them. Maybe try to concentrate you energies on finding new friends. In some ways doing that would complete your 'turn around' so to speak. That said, if you are keen on finding them again, don't give up on it. Maybe try facebook as well! I hope this helps a bit! (*hug*)
Well I've created a facebook account. All I need now is the courage to send a few greetings :icon_redf
UPDATE That guy I couldn't find on Myspace? Well he was on Facebook. I requested him as a friend and he accepted. We had a nice long conversation and caught up a bit. I feel a lot better; I'm going to try looking up a few more people
The mentality of most high schoolers is enough to stun the mind and send you descending into madness. Thinking is concidered uncool, but all the lazy asses always sit around the smart kid during the exams. simple rule: high school = hell. Now that that part of your life is over. I know with technology we are supposed to feel more connected to people, but it seems like it just isolates us.
