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Looking for a few a second opinion (and a third/fourth/etc..)

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by kettleoffish, Sep 23, 2009.

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  1. kettleoffish

    kettleoffish
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    Hey there EC :slight_smile:

    I just got back from band camp :slight_smile:icon_cool) and there was a boy there. Not what you're thinking though. He's 11/12 and I kept getting the impression that he 'liked' me. He knows that I'm gay (everyone in band does) and that I have a boyfriend, but he was following me around a lot and seemed to be trying to impress me a lot. He even danced with me at the party type thang we had on the last night (I went in drag (!) - looked fabulous as anything).

    Basically, I was wondering if anyone else thought he might 'like' me like that, or if it was just a kid hero-worshipping me or whatever. I'm obviously not interested, he's far too young and I'm taken anyway. He's a nice kid and I don't particularly mind his company, so it's no problem if he hangs around me, but I don't want to give him any false impressions, but, obviously, if I was to confront him about it and it turned out I'm overanalysing then it would be extremely awkward and just plain weird.

    Any advice guys?

    --Jonny x

    edit: title should say "looking for a second opinion (and a thrid/fourth/etc..)"
     
    #1 kettleoffish, Sep 23, 2009
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2009
  2. BasketCase

    BasketCase
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    He maybe does like you, or is curious about you being gay, and maybe him being gay.

    Its impossible for us to know the truth - I would say that it is worth being his friend - he obviously has respect for you.
     
    #2 BasketCase, Sep 23, 2009
  3. kettleoffish

    kettleoffish
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    He is also (mostly by coincidence) a complete clone of me :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    we both have the same first name (and initals), play the same instruments (trumpet and drums) and have older brothers who play guitar, have similar musical taste and even the same hoody - as I found out at the weekend, among other things

    edit: I'm not planning on shunning him at all, he's a funny little guy anyway, I just don't want to hurt him or give him false hope or whatever.
     
    #3 kettleoffish, Sep 23, 2009
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2009
  4. Gaetan

    Gaetan
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    Maybe bring up your boyfriend in conversation so he knows, either way, that you're taken?
     
    #4 Gaetan, Sep 23, 2009
  5. TwoPeronas

    TwoPeronas
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    Well maybe it was just being in the presence of someone who shares a similar lifestyle as him or he's just curious. When I found out one of my classmates was bi-sexual I kinda acted the same way he did =/

    I was so funny back then haha :slight_smile:
     
    #5 TwoPeronas, Sep 23, 2009
  6. L|L

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    The way he is acting at that age, I'm inclined to say it may be a crush or that he looks up to you.
     
    #6 L|L, Sep 23, 2009
  7. kramer362

    kramer362
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    He is probably gay or dealing with some sexuality issue and looks up to you. Even if he has a crush on you try being a role model :icon_bigg
     
    #7 kramer362, Sep 23, 2009
  8. Filip

    Filip
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    If you're dealing with being (possibly) gay, it's very easy to crush on the first gay guy that comes along. So he might just be at that stage. Then again, he might just really like to hang out with you without any second agenda.

    I don't think I would necessarily confront him about it. If he knows you have a boyfriend, he probably already knows that nothing's going to happen. It's probably best to do nothing unless he comes on to you, in which case you can make it clear you don't like him in that way.
     
    #8 Filip, Sep 24, 2009
  9. Kenko

    Kenko
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    The "dancing with you", may raise some questions, but it's hard to do anything but speculate without actually knowing him.

    He may be gay, he may not, but if you're a positive role model for him, and you enjoy his company, let him hang around you.

    Keep bringing up your boyfriend in conversation so he doesn't get any crazy ideas. But maybe if he is gay, he might eventually feel comfortable enough around you to tell you. At which point being a positive role model becomes even more important. But I wouldn't confront him about it.
     
    #9 Kenko, Sep 24, 2009
  10. stratavos

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    look to me like he's just looking to you as a role model. and since your lives are so similar, it makes it easier to call you a friend.
     
    #10 stratavos, Sep 24, 2009
  11. kettleoffish

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    Thanks guys :slight_smile:

    just to clarify, I've known the kid for over a year, but I normally only see him once a week at band, and it was only this weekend at camp that I noticed this :slight_smile:. I'll do as y'all say, look out for him, be a positive role model, and not say anything unless he actually comes onto me, and bring up the fact that I have a boyfriend from time to time so he doesn't get any ideas. Who knows, maybe I'll be the first person he comes out to :slight_smile: that would be so sweet, I'd feel all warm and fuzzy inside...

    jesus, I think I must be drumker than I thought I was..:slight_smile:
     
    #11 kettleoffish, Sep 24, 2009
  12. Just Adam

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    i actually think its cute lol, beeing a role model to the kid. he can be your padawan teach him the ways of the gay force....if he is gay haha if not you must turn him away from teh dark side ....ok enough star wars before george lucas has my ass... >.> just look out for him as you say and it should be cool :slight_smile:
     
    #12 Just Adam, Sep 25, 2009
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